Chestnut + Hazel: The Epic Adventures of Chestnut + Hazel in 1380 Stanzas

The Epic Adventures of Chestnut + Hazel in 1380 Stanzas

by Kenneth Larot Yamat dba Chestnut + Hazel

why are you not

paying any attention

to me right now?

I have been asking you

to pay attention to what

there are things that are

you not doing right now!

[where else can it be] I don't know where else to write this.

I could write it on my GitHub page, but [change is where the]

I kind of screwed up that page while reorganizing [pennies]

things, so I'll just write it here. [coin counters count the]

I'm applying for a number of programs as UNLV: the MFA

Creative Writing Program, the MS Quantitative Finance

Program, and the MS Computer Science program.

I didn't realize this until just now: each program has a

different due date, the MFA application is due first,

or earliest or whatever, in January.

They are all of the Fall semester of 2024. I have to get the

MFA application ready before January. I wrote

one poem recently, and I really can't

remember the last time I wrote one:

how can i see

you again when we are

not exactly on good

terms right now?

somewhere along

the lines that were

thinking that there

were all those things

we thought about how all

of the people were actually

tricking us into doing things

that weren't in our best interest.

I'm tired. What do I have due today? I have a few class

assignments and a Project due. I've been working on

the project for days, and I've had a really hard time

with it. I'll insert a few iframes below.

anyway, I'm kind of lost and don't really know what to do,

i need to go over this course material. I don't know why this most

recent project has monopolized my time. I got tied down with front-end

aspects that had almost nothing to do with the assignment, and I'm irritated about it.

My new restart version of project 14 did not go as well as I thought

it would have gone. I don't know what to do. I'm in a bad mood.

There are two things that I'm thinking about doing, forking project 14

version 2 to start project 14 version 3, making one more attempt

at the iframe carousel, and then getting the JSON and asynchronous stuff into project 14.

the other idea is going back to project 14 version 1 and just shoving the

2 additional things into it, it's a mess, but it works,

and the cleaner version 2 doesn't work.

Irritated.

i'm in class right now, and all this new

material is going way over my head.

I'm tired, and I haven't paid attention

in class in weeks.

most of the time I'm in class trying to

figure out past assignments.

my nails are. and I swore I just cut them, but they are

long enough to be interfering with my ability to type.

do I have any money?

I do not. I do not

have any money.

I am broke, and I know it.

I'm a little bit lost right now.

I was somewhere else, but I am

actually back here

I'm trying to think. There are a number of things I need to get done today.

I finished project 14, there were a lot of things that I wanted to do with

it, but, I ended up just going with the leaflet integration option, and

even doing that took a mountain of time. I integrated leaflet to my

Hamburgers project, and Connections for Mobile assignment.

I have a few class assignments, and I also have

some kind of professional development project that I have to

do.

and

I think that might be it.

Chestnut + Hazel was

originally founded as the DM Literary Review.

I really don't know what to do about money right now.

"Everything I had done has to be done over; I was on the wrong track entirely, and after working hard

most of that time: I'm still only at the beginning." - Gustave Flaubert

I don't know what to do right now.

[Development Notes] [I have eaten all of the plums that were in your bra where your boobies are]

<!-- check for deployment after a while. this was moved from codepen

into vscode and uploaded to GitHub to make this function better.

I really want to update this, maybe even change the look of it. -->

I think this was about my chestnut + hazel

connections page for project 14.

I'm uploading content to my YouTube channel, I'm not sure how exciting these videos are.

some of these videos are very long, and take a long time to upload as well, and I can't

really upload all of them at once because

my account doesn't have those permissions just yet.

my nails aren't that long, but I had to cut them because

they are messing with my ability to type again.

I really don't know what to do about money.

[Development Commentary]

<!-- [11/05/2023 06:00 AM]

[11/05/2023 06:00 AM] [Development Commentary]

[11/05/2023 03:35] [11/05/2023 03:40]

[11/05/2023 06:00 AM]

Even with as much time as I've spent on this, and seemingly

no closer to getting a JSON file working, I seem to have

made a breakthrough with this carousel. The iframes look like

they are interactive in a way that they were not interactive

in the original Project 10 version of the carousel.

I'm setting up links to see if the iframes in the carousel work,

and if they do, then that means this should work. and I can

get project 14 completed, even though this seems like it was kind

of a long digression from the requirements of project 14. -->

I'm spending some time today to work on my blog, as well as my YouTube channel.

I don't know. I need to do something with these gaming videos, like add

narration, or, say something, about what I'm thinking, about what some of my

decisions are when I'm playing. I'm kind of thinking of going with the Vanilla

version, rather than playing with so many mods, but, if there isn't one annoying

issue with the game, there is usually some other annoying issue. One thing

that takes up a lot more time than I would like it to, is the whole business of

managing the faction and ruling dynasty.

This is one of my earlier videos from the channel, when I

spent time reading poetry and all of that. It's

interesting to see all of the voice over stuff

that can be done with text to speech programs. I actually

saw an advertisement for one that I was really impressed with.

"Here's to momma dollar, and poppa dollar!"

I don't know what to do about money.

This is such a nightmare. Everything.

There is an issue with posting youtube

videos in iframes, they have to

have /embed/ in the source path.

headache. I thought that the video just wasn't

totally live or deployed on YouTube, but it

might be totally not going to work.

It seems like my upload limit for my YouTube channel is 8 videos

for any 24 hour period. Nothing I've produced

is particularly interesting, but, I'll come up with something.

Total War ROME 2 Battle of Ephesus

The Spartans are on the warpath throughout Asia

Minor, no one can stop them, except for the even more amazing

Roman Military! They will be stopped! Even if they! are! Sparta!

I'm spending way too much time playing

computer games. I'm trying to make something

out of it by recording videos

while I play, but the videos I make aren't

all that amazing.

There is something that I'm thinking about right now.

well. sometimes I listen to music or a documentary

while I work on other things. sometimes as an attempt at

multi-tasking.

but right now it just seems more appropriate to work on

this epic and fabulous poem of mine!

Good Lord! I spent the entire day gaming, the

entire past few days actually, and I've not

gotten any real work done,

or, well, I don't really feel like I've gotten

any work done.

I worked on my blog a little bit, made a few videos of me

fixing broken links on my blog. I have to work on Project 15,

and I really haven't even looked at what's required.

There's an issue with creating an embedded iframe, it's not really

possible to link just the YouTube page into an iframe as a

regular source, and suddenly I realize why,

you only want the video, and not the whole page that's on YouTube.

Walking Through The Grass (2019)

I remember walking

to work, about a mile or so

to a hotel where I worked, and

I had to walk through the grass

and the grass

was always wet, really wet, and

my pants would get wet too

and my boots would get wet

and my socks would get wet.

I spent a lot of time on that project, I really enjoy the end result. I

still want to make the contact modal work. These are comments removed from my GitHub files.

All the videos are now uploaded to YouTube. It took so long. i deleted my miscellaneous

repository, but then, i created a new miscellaneous repository because I have the index to that

repository linked elsewhere, so, I didn't want them to break, so I fixed it before it became a problem.

These videos that I've uploaded to YouTube today are taking forever to load. This time, I made the

decision to upload the largest files, rather than whatever random videos occurred to me to upload.

I figured that I could get these large files out of my

storage space. but, yeah, they are taking forever to upload.

My software development course will be over next week. This comes as kind of a relief, but I'm also

kind of sad about it, I really enjoyed this class. I don't know how I'm going to continue to stay

motivated to work on web and software development projects without project being due, everything I

work on after class will be a self directed project. Yeah, I've been spending way too much,

mountains of time playing computer games.

There is kind of a chicken and egg problem going on here. I need to

get an MMR vaccine to attend UNLV, I got my first dose something like

5 years ago when I applied to the MBA program at UNLV, I need to get a

second dose. I must have left Las Vegas before getting my second dose of

the MMR vaccine. I thought I took it already when I applied at UTA, but

the vaccine that UTA required was a meningitis vaccine. The funny thing

about the UTA thing, the meningitis vaccine, was that they kept sending

me notices to submit proof of vaccination for meningitis, but when I got

around to getting the vaccine and uploading proof, it turns out I didn't

really need to get it, it was for undergrads only. Waste of money.

So now I have to figure out how to get the MMR vaccine, the second dose. The

chicken and egg problem that I'm facing is that I need my MMR vaccine to enroll

in classes at UNLV, but I have to be enrolled in classes at UNLV to get a Student

ID card, and use the Student Health Services and get vaccinated. This isn't a huge

problem, it just means that I have to get vaccinated somewhere else.

I was experimenting with layouts for katastrophiena.com, and I really liked

the layout that I selected, and I actually decided to apply it to

chestnutandhazel.com. I think that it's really nice, and nothing

really broke. I recently. I've been making all the measurements

for the iframes percentage based, all the dimensions percentage

based, because I figured that I might change layouts from time to

time, and it seems to have kept things from getting messed up with

the new layout, or, style.

I don't know what to do right now.

I should be working on Project 16 right

now. It's actually. I don't actually have

to turn it in, but I should do it because

I need the experience of doing it, and,

well, I've just felt a whole lot less motivated lately.

My mind is kind of all over the place

right now. I have a lot of things to worry

about right now. I'm watching The Untouchables,

Brian de Palma (1987), and this really is a good

movie. Class starts in a few minutes. There is

only one more day of class left, Saturday the 18th,

but it's just a get-together kind of for the final day of class.

I have this other laptop, a second one, and it's

extremely slow, and I use it for watching the live course

via zoom, and I use my main laptop to do the work, but this

thing, my other laptop, is taking forever to load, it's always

slow, it's been slow since I bought it, and I'm really

surprised with how slow it is. I bought it during one of the

road trips, but, it's really super

slow. so slow that it hardly functions.

I remember these poems from when I moved to Missouri from Las

Vegas. I remember I didn't find work there for a

while. In Missouri. I did get a job at the prison in town,

but then, it wasn't really a job that was suitable

for me, and, it wasn't a good environment

for me either. I don't know what to do right now.

I'm using VS code right now, working on compiling the Adventures

of Chestnut + Hazel into a unified EPIC poem of the most EPIC

proportions!

I am failing MIS 768. Some of this is my own doing.

when is it not my own doing? but

one of the things

that makes this first semester different from the

web development course I took with Correlation One

is that I'm working right now.

I decided to take work off during the Fall, but I've

decided that I can't really afford to do that during the

spring. Nightmare.

I don't know. like. this might be

the end of my educational pursuits.

I'm going to post some old poems I wrote,

probably while I was at Mosaic, or during

the first few months when I first came to Missouri.

I guess you could call it

something of a wooded area.

There are trees and stuff and

A little bit of other flora.

I really like it.

I want to put all the ashes there

and let the trees absorb the nutrients of

the ashes. Maybe someday there will be

a cure for whatever illness needs curing

in that tree.

After we burn the trash, we look for any metal

that we can sell to the scrap yard. Burnt Tires

leave wires of metal that can be sold to the

scarp yard. What metal is it. I don't know.

All the gaming videos that I've captured are either being uploaded to my

Chestnut + Hazel channel, or my personal channel, so that's out of the way,

but many of the files are very large, and they are taking a long time to

upload, so I have to find something else to do in the meantime, I was supposed

to update my browser either today or yesterday, but I forgot to do it, with all

of this uploading I have to do, I have to keep my browser open. So I basically

haven't closed it and re-opened it to update my browser.

My plans for the next few days are to finish uploading all of my gaming videos

to my Chestnut + Hazel YouTube channel, and then hold off on gaming for a while.

I could probably get all of that done today. I have so many videos uploaded already,

and I think that I have about 20 more that I'm in the process of uploading. I scheduled

them way out into the future, all the way until the end of 2024 because I didn't want them

all dropping at once. Once that's done I'm going to focus on putting together my UNLV

applications. I just noticed something funny, I noticed that when Slack loads, the

screen says: Reticulating Splines, which is from SimCity.

I have 7 videos left to upload. A lot of these videos have just been sped up with 4x or

16x to reduce the file size, and make the action happen more quickly.

I'm really happy about completing the Software

Development course, and I'm really proud of

this. Tomorrow is the last day of class, but it's

not really a full class. I'm not sure what to do next.

Below I've posted an old video of a poetry reading video that I made years ago.

I'm not sure what to work on right now. Today is

Sunday, and everything is kind of a free day for a

while. I should look for work. Apply for a few positions.

I made a few game playing videos where I have voice overs or

narrations what what's going on, and what decisions I'm making.

Even with the videos sped up to 10x to 16x, there still seems

to be a lack of things to say.

so what am I up to right now? I'm really just making gaming videos and

uploading them to YouTube. I tried making a YouTube short, but I think my

video was over budget, time wise. I guess I'll find out. I could have sworn that

I've seen YouTube shorts that are in the 4 minute range. I bought this down to 1:25

minutes, but I'm not sure if that's short enough to be a short.

I'm feeling worried about the future.

I went in for my entrance exam for the

Spanish Translation program, and I don't

really think that it went well: I didn't

really study because I spent these last few

days immersed in my gaming, and didn't do

anything else really, and now, I'm sick of the

game, and now I probably have time to do productive

stuff. Part of the reason I wasn't really motivated

to study was because I did manage to get accepted into

the Entrepreneurship and Innovation program, and I already

enrolled in as many classes as I plan to take, and my

original goal was to get into one program or the other.

The thing that I'm worried about for the future is money.

I've been out of work for 4 months, and I also

haven't had any income, money coming in during

that time. I tried to sign up for food delivery

stuff, but that didn't really work. I don't really

know what to do. I don't know what to do. I really

don't know what to do. I would like to be working,

but I really need to find the right role. I need to

land the right role, the right position.

I'm not really looking for an employer right now.

and this comment is related to stanza 60 above,

this is akward because these are written right after

the other, but happened at very different times.

I was looking for a role last year, but not this year.

four months later.

I have an exam tomorrow, and I'm not even really prepared. In

fact I'm not even really prepared at all. I was working on this

Spanish Translations project, but it really hasn't gone anywhere,

and it's not even close to being done. I also have to find work;

I thought about doing the food delivery and rideshare stuff, but,

I had an incident today where I concluded that it might not really be

something that is workable. There are major traffic issues in Las Vegas

that make driving really frustrating, and I'm not really sure I would be

able to do it. I still need to find work, though. Or some source of income.

there was an employer

event at UNLV that I would have

attended, and that I was going to attend.

but I did not attend the event. things weren't

going well in MIS 768, so I scrapped any plans for

that week, only for things to really go downhill

in that class.

I shaved, and I think that my face looks a lot nicer than it

does when I have facial hair, but I didn't shave my head, but

I still think that I look a lot nicer when I have my face shaved.

I exfoliated, and I had a lot of dead skin and all that. It was

really kind of gross, but I was really happy to get my face clean.

I worked on my translations project.

The favicon stuff is annoying. sizing and stretching things. making

it look right it the browser tab. important. but annoying.

I've been kind of not really doing anything lately. Nothing, other than playing on the computer,

and really just playing from the start over and over, again and again. I bought a phone mount,

like the kind for my car, but I mounted it on my wall next to my desk. This is kind of cool, and

I've been thinking about doing this for a while, but didn't do it, because I didn't really want to

spend the money on something like this, but it really helps because I usually watch movies on my

phone, rather than my computer, and when my phone is just sitting on my desk I can't really see

what's going on on-screen.

somewhere we were

all seeing new things

that were appearing

in our eyes and in

our mind our thoughts

I have 1 more class I need to enroll in at UNLV. Just like at UTA, I have to request permission

for pretty much every class I try to enroll in. I'm not sure how long I should wait before

reaching out a second time. The annoying thing is, is that I didn't realize before hand that

I needed to request permission for every class I need to take, so I didn't ask permission for

both classes the first time, I only requested permission for the one class I thought that I

needed to request permission for. I thought the other class didn't require it, so I'm waiting

for the other class to be unlocked.

Spring (2023)

Translated from Primaveral (1888) by Rubén Darío

During the blossoming months, my

rhymes run in circles through a vast

forest to collect nectar and

aromatics from blooming flowers.

Come, my love! to our place: the hallowed

grove where an ambience of love floats

above the aromas of the foliage of Spring.

A bird flies from tree to tree and

greets you, and your face, blushing

and as beautiful as the dawn and the

superb oaks, tall and robust,

tremble as you walk by, its leaves

shake and its branches rise to give

way to the queen. My Love! It's the

sweet spring season.

There are a number of challenges I'm facing when it comes to monetizing my blogs

or my other content. There are a whole bunch of Search Console issues that I'm not

clear about how to fix, and then there are minimum viewer requirements on YouTube

that will take a while to complete, and then there are content issues with Blogger

that aren't really clear to me how to resolve.

I want to get a new gaming laptop, but I have to wait until next year. One that

meets the minimum requirements for the games I'm looking to play, even the new

ones, doesn't look too expensive, it's more than I would normally spend on a

laptop for general use, but it seems less than what gaming laptops costs, or,

what I'm used to seeing gaming laptops cost. One of the things I'm not too sure

about is how long the deal will last, or if

gaming laptops should drop in general later on.

I'm trying to turn my gaming into something like a business, but, yeah, I don't

fully know how to do that. I seem to be getting more attention my my regular

YouTube channel when compared to my Chestnut + Hazel YouTube channel.

These posts. and this is just a note. these stanzas, although

they are numbered sequentially, the events they refer to are not

in. they are not necessarily in chronological order.

they might not even be in the order

they were originally published in. and not in the order

they were originally written in. so. good luck to anyone

who read this.

There

are no words to

describe

the agony of

eating too much

food at the buffet

when you go to

the buffet

and eat all

that you can eat.

There was a place that i came across

today while I was out DoorDashing,

and it was a place called ONO or

something. Ono Sushi. I just looked

it up. I think that I might want to eat there.

I did food delivery work today. I delivered 1 meal. It didn't take long to

get the first order, but after that order, the zone I was working in dried

up, so I switched zones, once I got there, there weren't really any orders

to pick up, so I figured there wasn't really much work that day, so I went

home. I've very rarely been able to make delivering food profitable.

If she asks me

why I wasn't able to

get anything done while

she was away, I will tell her

the truth: I was thinking about

you, and when I think about you,

when I started thinking about you

I couldn't stop masterbating.

so I fell asleep. afterward.

There

are no words to

describe

the agony of

eating too much

food at the buffet

when you go to

the buffet

and eat all

that you can eat.

There was a place that i came across today while

I was out DoorDashing, and it was a place called

ONO or something. Ono Sushi. I just looked it up.

I think that I might want to eat there.

I did food delivery work today. I delivered 1 meal.

It didn't take long to get the first order, but after

that order, the zone I was working in dried up, so I

switched zones, once I got there, there weren't really

any orders to pick up, so I figured there wasn't really

much work that day, so I went home. I've very rarely been

able to make delivering food profitable.

There

are no words to

describe

the agony of

eating too much

food at the buffet

when you go to

the buffet

and eat all

that you can eat.

There was a place that

i came across today while

I was out DoorDashing, and

it was a place called ONO or

something. Ono Sushi. I just

looked it up. I think that

I might want to eat there.

I did food delivery work today.

I delivered 1 meal. It didn't take

long to get the first order, but after

that order, the zone I was working in

dried up, so I switched zones, once I got

there, there weren't really any orders to

pick up, so I figured there wasn't really

much work that day, so I went home. I've very

rarely been able to make delivering food profitable.

I deleted my facebook, instagram, twitter (X), and

linkedin accounts. I also think that deleted a

number of other social media accounts as well,

Pinterest. I'm not sure I really used that account.

One of the things that sometimes worried me about using.

one of the things that often worried me about deleting

these accounts is that. Maybe. someone might create a

fake account using my name and all that. I don't know.

I won't worry about that right now. I'm honestly. really.

I'm surprised how many other Ken Yamat, and kenneth Yamat

profiles are out there. I guess my name isn't all that

special after all.

Door Dashing really can be a challenge.

and. it's not always just a simple game of

picking up and dropping off food.

i. honestly. really wish it was that easy.

Um. So I did Door Dash today, I had one order.

for like 3 hours of driving, and I'm somewhat

discouraged. After spending all that money to obtain

business licenses, and getting a commercial auto policy

that's way more expensive than what I was paying for a

personal policy. I'm, you know. Not sure what to do.

The order that I did get was somewhat accidental, I was

toggling between per order and per hours just to check

it out, and the order I got was a per hour order.

and I'm thinking, it might make sense to switch between

the two during certain times of the day. The traffic was

really bad in whatever area I was in.

Anyway. I called it a day after trying for 3 hours, and only

getting one order. Some days are better than others, and I think.

on days where it seems like slim pickings, it might make sense

to just go back home and work on something else.

Today. and I'm referring to the 18th, I often stay up

overnight. Today wasn't a very fruitful day in terms of

Door Dashing. The weekend wasn't as much of a money maker

as I thought it would have been.

My conclusion is that it might be better to start later on

in the day. Maybe around 8:00 PM or something. I've been

pushing my start times back further and further. I

thought 4:00 PM was already somewhat late.

If I'm going to work nights, then I need to buy a jacket.

Today. and I'm referring to the 18th,

I often stay up overnight. Today wasn't

a very fruitful day in terms of Door

Dashing. The weekend wasn't as much of a

money maker as I thought it would have been.

My conclusion is that it might be better to

start later on in the day. Maybe around 8:00

PM or something. I've been pushing my start

times back further and further. I thought 4:00

PM was already somewhat late.

If I'm going to work nights, then I need to

buy a jacket.

DoorDashing. yeah. I'm really not looking

for an employer right now. being self-employed

is a challenge, but. I'm just really not looking

for an employer right now.

I managed to buy a jacket today.

Money hasn't been this tight in a while, but there is

one positive thing. I think that I'm able to stop pulling

money out of my savings, and eventually, to start paying

down my credit balances.

Life is extremely challenging right now.

I went on a road trip. not a very exciting one, but,

I don't know. I'm in a slightly better mood than before.

I went from Las Vegas, to San Diego, to Yuma, and back to Vegas.

Really not looking for an employer right now. I'm really not.

I went on a road trip. not a very exciting one, but, I don't

know. I'm in a slightly better mood than before. I went from

Las Vegas, to San Diego, to Yuma, and back to Vegas.

My focus right now is to work on my

catalog of intellectual property.

my focus is not to find an employer.

If I were still filing a continued unemployment claim

I probably would be looking for an employer, but since I'm

not filing a claim, I'm not looking!

I went on a road trip. not a very exciting one,

but, I don't know. I'm in a slightly better mood

than before. I went from Las Vegas, to San Diego,

to Yuma, and back to Vegas.

as far as MIS 768 goes. I'm just not really sure

what to do right now. and what I mean is:

I know that I'm failing the course. I know that I

will have to audit the course. what I'm trying

to figure out is how to salvage this situation?

how do I, you know, still get something for the

money I paid to take the course?

A few days ago I took a road trip from

Las Vegas, to San Diego, to Yuma, and back

to Las Vegas. San Diego reminds me of Austin,

just older and larger.

There is a convention from MIS 768 that I like, and it's this:

Author's Name: Kenneth Larot Yamat

Purpose of Program: To calculate the shipping

cost of a parcel at a

parcel service store

Date Due: March 3rd, 2024

I don't know how I would use that in this document.

this is going to be registered as a Poem, like an Epic Poem

of ancient antiquity!

Life is something of a

nightmare right now.

I thought the bleeding would

stop, that I'd get my

budget in order during December,

but that is something that did not happen.

I don't even want to make any remarks

about what I anticipate for January,

out of a fear that I might jinx it.

// /**/System.out.println(" Data for Package # 1"); // entryNumber// this number

// needs to increment depending on the number of packages. // this number needs

// to iterate depending on the number of packages.

// this line is being moved down System.out.println("Please enter the"+ red + "

// weight "+reset+"of your parcel:"); // " and the "+ red +"dimensions "+reset+

// System.out.println(" "); // I don't know what's going on here, the line won't

// skip. I know what it is, it's on the wrong line.

// keyboard.nextLine();

// System.out.println("Please enter the"+ red + " weight "+reset+"of your

// parcel:");

// double packageWeight = keyboard.nextDouble(); // this needs to be a double.

// // String packageWeight = keyboard.nextLine(); // this needs to be a double.

// // String packageWeight = keyboard.nextLine();

// keyboard.nextLine();

// Package package = new Package(packageWeight, packageLength, packageWidth,

// packageHeight);

School starts soon. Later on

in the month. There are a few

things I need to get done to prepare,

but I've been so busy doing DoorDash

that I haven't exactly come around to

it, but I have to get it done today.

School starts soon. Later on in the month.

There are a few things I need to get

done to prepare, but I've been so busy doing

DoorDash that

I haven't exactly come around to it, but I

have to get it done today.

I'm in a really lousy mood right now.

I'm kind of stressed out. I'm kind of

frustrated about things right now.

I managed to finish quite a bit of the

required tasks for school. Mostly

orientation related tasks and online

modules.

I need to go out Door Dashing and all that,

but I'm really tired right now, but it's

kind of a mood related fatigue.

100

When something is published. When something

is pushed to GitHub. I really do considered

published. because. it's available to the

public. it's just that not many people

are on, you know digging around in repositories

reading text files and all that.

but I do consider this published.

101

I'm in a really lousy mood right now.

I'm kind of stressed out. I'm kind of

frustrated about things right now.

I managed to finish quite a bit of the required

tasks for school. Mostly orientation related tasks

and online modules.

I need to go out Door Dashing and

all that, but I'm really

tired right now, but it's kind of a mood related fatigue.

102

Back in November I bought a vape pen a refillable one

after trying the disposable vape pens for a while and this

thing will not stop leaking I don't know what to do I'm

thinking about getting a different type of vape pen I'm

not sure I really like the disposable vape pens but it's

primarily based on cost because the disposables are

just so expensive

School has started and yesterday was our first day of orientation

this semester I'm taking two classes both of them are MIS classes

I'm enrolled in the entrepreneurship program I'm not sure

what kind of business I would start if I were to start one

the other day I was trying to buy clothes and I just have

so many problems with getting the correct fit and if I were

to start something it would be like some kind of clothes

business I thought about buying a sewing machine because

like my pants are just too damn long but I don't know if

I really want to start sewing stuff because it's such a

headache I have all these pants that just don't fit and

it never really mattered because I always wore boots so

like if if my pants were too long it wasn't really a

problem and I really didn't notice.

I'm using text to speech to write this. I don't really

get much time to sit down and type so finding this feature

on my phone has turned out to be really useful. nothing is

punctuated and I guess that's just the way text to speech

works, but I could always go back and punctuate this if I need to.

There are a few things that I realized while I was door

dashing that made me start to use text to speech one of

the things was that I can't really type if I'm driving

but if I use the phone if somebody wants to access what

I have to say they have to access their voicemail box

like if I leave a message and so it just made more sense

to use text to speech and send it by text the way they

could just read whatever I said it's not like I'm really

saying anything to complex when I'm using text to speech

for the most part anyway

A while ago I think I wrote about how I wanted to buy

a jacket and what ended up happening is that I ended

up buying two sweaters two jackets and four pairs of

pants after buying the sweaters I realized that I don't

really like sweaters and part of the reason for that is

that with jackets I have a jacket pocket and I don't really

like having so many things in my pants pockets so I bought

these sweaters and I'm not really planning on using them

I really like the sweaters but from a usefulness

standpoint I just don't anticipate

ever really wearing them

103

classes start on the 16th. the two orientation

classes are over. I wore a tie for the second day,

but, it was mostly for getting a portrait photograph

taken, but, I seem to have missed it. I guess I thought

that there would be a kind of designated time to get our

portrait photos taken, but, it was more of whenever you

have the opportunity to get one kind of deal. and. yeah, i missed it.

104

classes start on the 16th. the two orientation classes are over.

I wore a tie for the second day, but, it was mostly for getting a portrait

photograph taken, but, I seem to have missed it. I guess I thought that there

would be a kind of designated time to get our portrait photos taken, but, it

was more of whenever you have the opportunity to get one kind of deal. and.

yeah, i missed it.

105

I bought a new toilet seat. The wood ones were

less expensive than the plastic ones, which was nice,

so, I bought a wood one.

106

I'm trying to think.

107

I bought a parking pass. I think that I only

have class once a week, and it's after parking

enforcement hours. so maybe I didn't really need to

pay for a parking permit, but then again, I might be on

campus to do this or that, and, I'm going to apply for

positions on campus, so I might use it.

I need to get a new phone, my current phone is cracked,

and, it's also kind of falling apart.

108

I bought a parking pass. I think that

I only have class once a week, and it's

after parking enforcement hours. so maybe

I didn't really need to pay for a parking

permit, but then again, I might be on campus

to do this or that, and, I'm going to

apply for positions on campus, so I might use it.

I need to get a new phone, my current phone

is cracked, and, it's also kind of falling apart.

109

I finally bought a new phone. My last one

cracked not too long after I bought it. It

was weird because I hadn't cracked a phone

that soon after buying it in a while. I think

I had it for 7 months. My last phone was really

falling apart, it wasn't just cracked.

110

I'm really frustrated right

now. I really feel like

going on a short road trip

to blow off some steam, but

I kind of scheduled an appointment

for Monday, but there was no

confirmation on the other side, so.

and

today is

already monday.

so. a road trip is

kind of out of the

question right now.

and

i have to be prudent

about how i waste my time.

maybe i could go out and

eat something ridiculous, but

i don't know of anything ridiculous

that's open at 3 AM.

the only kind of food that's available

at 3 AM is basically totally normal

kinds of food.

Let's see:

Hitchin' Post Saloon

I've actually been wanting to eat

here for a while, but, I think this

is some kind of steakhouse or something,

and that's pretty much normal food.

Bourbon Street Sports Bar

I've eaten here before, and I think I spent like 30 bucks.

I don't mind spending 30 bucks on a meal, but the meal

has to be worth 30 bucks, and whatever I ate here really

wasn't worth 30 bucks.

Northstar Bar and Grill

this place is close, but I think it's just

normal food.

there are a number of taco stands and taco trucks,

the last time I went to a taco stand I spent 47

dollars. i think I ate 18 tacos, it was some

multiple of 6. I think it was 14 tacos actually.

I want to eat some kind of

fish.

I'm still in a really lousy mood right now.

i'm trying to think.

I want to eat indian food.

Delhi Indian & Nepali Cuisine Express

the building that's on google maps

isn't really all that sexy.

but the address

333 W St Louis Ave, Las Vegas, NV 89102

I basically have to eat there now.

and here's why

333 is simply one of my favorite numbers.

and west saint louis just kills me because

kansas city is in the west and saint louis is on the

eastern part of missouri. kansas city is part kansas and

part missouri, and saint louis is part missouri and part illinois.

place isn't open right now though.

oh. I realize what this is.

it's a

Virtual restaurant

it's basically doordash only kind of orders.

like it basically only exists to fulfill doordash orders.

I'm still trying to think.

at this point i'm not even hungry anymore.

i'm in slightly less of a bad mood.

111

good god.

i need to get something to eat

i'm not hungry really

i'm just not really in much of a good mood.

i'm in a really garbage kind of mood.

i'm not even hungry.

and

eating something is not really

a solution

but i can't really think of anything else

i enjoy doing

i don't feel hungry

112

so i ended up at saffron flavors of india

113

this is one of the few times i've ever

successfully fixed a Google Search Console

issue. but this also comes with . this also

came with a seperate email stating that i

had not resolved some other - seperate

google search console issue.

114

i have to watch what i eat when i go out. i really

feel like i ate too much.

i have to get these small assignments done.

I don't know what to do for money. I haven't interviewed for anything in a while.

[Development Commentary]

Sometimes when I go into interviews it's not clear to me if the interviewer

is just looking to kill time, or if they are actually looking to fill the

role. When I went into this interview with Copart, it felt like the interviewer

only had the intention of mocking my work history, and like, she didn't start the

interview until an hour or so after the scheduled time.

I'm still really angry that my unemployment claim was denied,

and that I'm not getting paid out on it.

but.

if they aren't going to pay me, then I almost see no reason to look for work.

I'll keep looking as long as I have an appeal outstanding, but, in many ways it

feels like looking for work is a total waste of my time.

I'm worried about running out of money before I get into college.

I can't seem to put together

enough letters of recommendation, and, this is a real nightmare. A real nightmare.

I can't really leave Las Vegas, and UNLV is the only college in Las Vegas

that has a graduate school.

All the programs at UNLV require more letters of recommendation that I can

reasonably put together,

and. I don't know.

Total War ROME 2: Battle of Pella (2023) During the Macedonian wars of 209 BC The

Julian Dynasty takes the bold move to attack the Macedonians at the very heart of

their empire: The Capital of Pella. Defended by their own world renowned Macedonian

warriors, and reinforced by their Epirot and Spartan allies, the Capital of Pella

makes for a difficult battle, over the course of three separate major assaults on

the city, Pella is finally captured by none other than Sextus Nerva himself.

I had to get

rid of a bunch

of this stuff for

some reason.

115

I don't why my life always goes

straight to hell every now and then.

116

what a nightmare. a total nightmare.

I don't know what else to say. things

are not going the way that I want them

to. headache. nightmare. life oscillates

between being a headache, to a nightmare,

and back.

117

I'm not sure what to work on right now.

Today is Sunday, and everything is kind of a

free day for a while. I should look for work.

Apply for a few positions. I made a few game

playing videos where I have voice overs or

narrations what what's going on, and what

decisions I'm making. Even with the videos

sped up to 10x to 16x, there still seems to

be a lack of things to say.

118

I'm not sure what to work on right now. Today is

Sunday, and everything is kind of a free day for a

while. I should look for work. Apply for a few

positions. I made a few game playing videos where

I have voice overs or narrations what what's going

on, and what decisions I'm making. Even with the

videos sped up to 10x to 16x, there still seems

to be a lack of things to say.

119

so what am I up to right now? I'm really

just making gaming videos and uploading them

to YouTube. I tried making a YouTube short,

but I think my video was over budget, time wise.

I guess I'll find out. I could have sworn that

I've seen YouTube shorts that are in the 4 minute

range. I bought this down to 1:25 minutes, but I'm

not sure if that's short enough to be a short.

120

I am failing MIS 768 right now. really

hard too. I applied for the computer Science

program, and. if i'm failing an MIS course. then.

well.

121

I've added some content below from my Spanish Translations

project. I've recently got bogged down messing around with

an old project that doesn't seem to work in it's new area.

I don't know what's going on, or why it doesn't work except

on my landing page. I did get rid of something that was

making it kind of a headache, and the thing was the

transform hover effect.

122

I'm going to forget about messing around with fixing the

project 11 contact form, for whatever reason, it does not

work. It's the same thing as what i have on my landing page,

so I don't know why it doesn't work. so dumb. I might try one

more thing. but then again, I really have to work on my

translations project, and this is just something I'm messing

around with.

123

I'm putting together the texts that I'll be translating for

this project. I'm also working on my YouTube videos. For video

editing, I'm mostly just consolidating and speeding up videos

and adding music, and uploading them, and I can't really do this

while playing the games themselves because my computer slows down

a lot.

Buying a new gaming laptop is something that I thought about, but

I think that I'll wait to do it. A gaming computer that can play

the games I want to play doesn't look too expensive, but I really

have to wait to spend that kind of money right now.

Two Spanish Language Authors have been replaced

César Vallejo with José de Espronceda

Pablo Neruda with Antonio Machado

I created a few additional JavaScript functions to allow

the contact forms to be visible inside the iframe and clickable

inside the list.

124

I think that everything has been set up, once everything is

deployed, then I can focus on making translations for the

pages that I've set up.

125

So I set up the .md files for the four authors that I'm going

to translate from English to Spanish, and the four authors

that I'm going to translate from Spanish to English. I selected

all authors whose work I expect to be in the Public Domain.

126

VS Code is such a great too. even

for editing non-computer code

documents.

127

Getting the Readme iframe and Document Title swap to work is complete,

the next stage in this project is to pick 4 authors to translate.

I'll pick four authors to translate from English to Spanish,

and 4 authors to translate from Spanish to English.

For English to Spanish:

William Carlos Williams

T. S. Eliot

Wallace Stevens

E. E. Cummings

For Spanish to English:

Rubén Darío

César Vallejo

Pablo Neruda

Miguel de Unamuno

128

This is awesome! it actually works, the title and the document

change when clicked! I'm going to come back around to this and

continue to work on it later.

129

There are a few other things that I need to work on,

I need to set up katastrophiena to be eligible for

AdSense, and, I think that the main thing is that

I need a longer history of posts for this blog. This

might take a while, and take away from all the other

things that I'm working on. Anyway. I'm getting sucked

into computer gaming right now, not with any games that

are new, but games that I've had for a long time. I've

been thinking about buying a gaming laptop, something

inexpensive, and I came across one, but, I really

have to hold out on buying anything like that right now.

I have to wait before spending money on something

like a new laptop, at least until next year.

130

I'm working on a number of things right now.

One is setting up a page on GitHub Pages for

my Spanish Translations Project. I was having

trouble with a contact forms section of my page,

this isn't needed for my Translations Page, I just

set it up so it works, or, I'm just been trying to

make the links work. Basically, I took Project 16,

my Project 16 page, and used it as a starting point

for my Spanish Translations Project. One of the things

I left from the old page and kept on the new page was

a section for Contact Forms that I made throughout the

course I took. There is one Contact Form that just doesn't

really work. It's the one from Project 11 I don't know

what wrong.

and I'm really not in the mood to work on it because.

I just really don't really want to work on it right

now. So I guess I wont.

131

There is one thing that I have found that helps

with the video uploading process, for longer videos,

it makes sense to speed up the video all the way up to

16x speed, and the reason why is that, videos longer

than an hour, and even longer than 10 minutes, are

really slow paced, and it's much easier to get an

idea of what's happening when the video is moving

faster. This also reduces the file size, and makes

uploading quicker.

There are some games that are really slow paced,

like the tower game that I'm playing, but also,

the same is true for many other city building games as well.

132

I need to come up with a better workflow for uploading

gaming videos to YouTube. They take a hell of a long

time to upload, especially larger files, I would reduce

the file size, but it's not really clear to me how to do

that. There is an issue with gaming videos, they often

need to be high resolution, a lot of these videos need to

be high resolution, I don't even have a very large screen

on my laptop, and in many cases, the videos seem to be

blurry. On the other hand, I'm not sure if these are

going to be viewed mainly on a large screen, or a small

screen, like a phone.

133

I'm thinking about how everything seems to have been falling

apart for me over these past few months. I lost my job, I

haven't found a new one, and I'm burning through my money.

I'm a little bit demotivated. or unmotivated. or just basically

lacking very much or even any motivation. I'm cutting it close

it terms of money. I need to find work. Land a job or something.

The Internet connection here is slow, it's not normally this

slow, but for whatever reason, it's slower than syrup. I'm

working on a number of things right now, but I'm also kind

of bouncing around mentally from idea to idea, from worry to

worry.

Somewhere in the back of my mind I'm wondering if I'm cursed

or something. Like, there's nothing I can do, and this is just

the way things are going to go for me, but I have no idea why

I would be cursed, or what would be the cause of the curse, or

why I would be cursed, or who would want to place a curse on me.

134

I've added some content below from my Spanish Translations project.

I've recently got bogged down messing around with an old project that

doesn't seem to work in it's new area. I don't know what's going on,

or why it doesn't work except on my landing page. I did get rid of

something that was making it kind of a headache, and the thing was the

transform hover effect.

I'm going to forget about messing around with fixing the

project 11 contact form, for whatever reason, it does not

work. It's the same thing as what i have on my landing page,

so I don't know why it doesn't work. so dumb. I might try one

more thing. but then again, I really have to work on my

translations project, and this is just something I'm messing

around with.

I'm putting together the texts that I'll be translating for

this project. I'm also working on my YouTube videos. For video

editing, I'm mostly just consolidating and speeding up videos

and adding music, and uploading them, and I can't really do this

while playing the games themselves because my computer slows down

a lot.

Buying a new gaming laptop is something that I thought about, but

I think that I'll wait to do it. A gaming computer that can play

the games I want to play doesn't look too expensive, but I really

have to wait to spend that kind of money right now.

Two Spanish Language Authors have been replaced

César Vallejo with José de Espronceda

Pablo Neruda with Antonio Machado

I created a few additional JavaScript functions to allow

the contact forms to be visible inside the iframe and clickable

inside the list.

135

I think that I accidentally

posted. copied and pasted

the same post twice.

136

I think that everything has been set up, once everything is

deployed, then I can focus on making translations for the

pages that I've set up.

137

I haven't even looked at the Spanish Translation

project in a while. After not passing the Spanish Entrance

exam I more or less figured I would put it on the back burner.

138

So I set up the .md files for the four authors that I'm going

to translate from English to Spanish, and the four authors

that I'm going to translate from Spanish to English. I selected

all authors whose work I expect to be in the Public Domain.

139

Getting the Readme iframe and Document Title swap to work is complete,

the next stage in this project is to pick 4 authors to translate.

I'll pick four authors to translate from English to Spanish,

and 4 authors to translate from Spanish to English.

For English to Spanish:

William Carlos Williams

T. S. Eliot

Wallace Stevens

E. E. Cummings

For Spanish to English:

Rubén Darío

César Vallejo

Pablo Neruda

Miguel de Unamuno

140

This is awesome! it actually works, the title and the document

change when clicked! I'm going to come back around to this and

continue to work on it later.

141

There are a few other things that I need to work on, I

need to set up katastrophiena to be eligible for AdSense,

and, I think that the main thing is that I need a longer

history of posts for this blog. This might take a while,

and take away from all the other things that I'm working on.

Anyway. I'm getting sucked into computer gaming right now,

not with any games that are new, but games that I've had for

a long time. I've been thinking about buying a gaming laptop,

something inexpensive, and I came across one, but, I really

have to hold out on buying anything like that right now.

I have to wait before spending money on something like a new

laptop, at least until next year.

142

I'm working on a number of things right now. One is setting up

a page on GitHub Pages for my Spanish Translations Project. I

was having trouble with a contact forms section of my page,

this isn't needed for my Translations Page, I just set it up

so it works, or, I'm just been trying to make the links work.

Basically, I took Project 16, my Project 16 page, and used it

as a starting point for my Spanish Translations Project. One

of the things I left from the old page and kept on the new page

was a section for Contact Forms that I made throughout the course

I took. There is one Contact Form that just doesn't really work.

It's the one from Project 11 I don't know what wrong.

and I'm really not in the mood to work on it because. I just really

don't really want to work on it right now. So I guess I wont.

143

There is one thing that I have found that helps with the video uploading

process, for longer videos, it makes sense to speed up the video all the

way up to 16x speed, and the reason why is that, videos longer than an

hour, and even longer than 10 minutes, are really slow paced, and it's

much easier to get an idea of what's happening when the video is moving

faster. This also reduces the file size, and makes uploading quicker.

There are some games that are really slow paced, like the tower game

that I'm playing, but also, the same is true for many other city

building games as well.

144

I need to come up with a better workflow for uploading gaming videos

to YouTube. They take a hell of a long time to upload, especially

larger files, I would reduce the file size, but it's not really clear

to me how to do that. There is an issue with gaming videos, they often

need to be high resolution, a lot of these videos need to be high

resolution, I don't even have a very large screen on my laptop,

and in many cases, the videos seem to be blurry. On the other hand,

I'm not sure if these are going to be viewed mainly on a large

screen, or a small screen, like a phone.

145

I'm thinking about how everything seems to have been falling apart

for me over these past few months. I lost my job, I haven't found

a new one, and I'm burning through my money. I'm a little bit

demotivated. or unmotivated. or just basically lacking very much

or even any motivation. I'm cutting it close it terms of money.

I need to find work. Land a job or something.

The Internet connection here is slow, it's not normally this slow,

but for whatever reason, it's slower than syrup. I'm working on a

number of things right now, but I'm also kind of bouncing around

mentally from idea to idea, from worry to worry.

Somewhere in the back of my mind I'm wondering if I'm cursed or something.

Like, there's nothing I can do, and this is just the way things are going

to go for me, but I have no idea why I would be cursed, or what would be the

cause of the curse, or why I would be cursed, or who would want to place a

curse on me.

146

I'm more or less going to be continuing

this blog from GitHub going forward, but you

can still see updates here from the iframe below.

147

I'm more or less going to be continuing this blog

from GitHub going forward, but you can still see

updates here from the iframe below.

149

I'm more or less going to be continuing this blog

from GitHub going forward, but you can still see

updates here from the iframe below.

149

I think that I had multiple posts

where the chestnutandhazel.com posts

were just iframes of documents that I

published first on GitHub.

150

I'm more or less going to be continuing this

blog from GitHub going forward, but you can

still see updates here from the iframe below.

151

and another one.

152

Adventure # 3 - 10/11/2023 21:16 - Originally Posted In CSS\style.css

This is probably going to be the least user friendly blog ever. Tell me: are you reading this? Is it nice and user friendly?

because I'm not sure I really care, you're basically reading my diary. Whether or not it's user friendly isn't really my problem.

One of the issues I have with what I post on chestnutandhazel.com is that It's hosted, or whatever, it's really just an account

on blogger.com, so since it's basically a social media account, I have to comply with the community guidles of blogger.com, and

since I have adsense active on that page, I also have to comply with any adsense advertiser standards, so I have my hands tied

in many respects. chestnutandhazel.com continues to get flagged over and over and over, and in many cases I don't really want to

deal with it right away.

the other issue is that I also have to post what I write somewhere, so that I can use the standard copyright registration form,

rather than the unpublished copyright registration form, so, that's another issue. so you know, it's kind of whatever.

i basically couldn't figure out how to do this in javascript, but since this is a styling concern, I don't feel the least bit bad

about styling it with Cascading Style Sheets: HAHAHAHA!

https://www.w3schools.com/tags/tag_small.asp

https://www.w3schools.com/css/css_font_size.asp

Currently Watching: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyzZW6fpzik

153

I'm feeling incredibly scatter brained. I have a project

due for my software and web development course today, and

I haven't even started. This should be simple, so I'm not

too worried about it, but, at the same time, I know from

the past that these things could take quite a while if I

hit a brick wall.

There are other issues that I'm facing, especially on the

income front. The temp assignment was not a particularly

good fit, and, I really get the feeling that I should avoid

any kind of warehouse or factory work, even though, that's

sort of what I've been doing for the past five years, but I

don't have the slightest clue what to look for.

Life is such an unbelievable struggle. I don't really know

what to do about money. Somewhere in the back of my mind

there's this voice telling me that I should stop looking

for a job or employment or whatever, and, that I should

focus on trying to make money doing stock market shit.

154

https://www.chestnutandhazel.com/2019/06/reflection-714-by-chestnut-and-hazel.html

Reflection # 714 by Chestnut and Hazel

I don't know exactly what I've been spending on buying lunch and soda at work,

but I know that it is too damn much, I want to say it is around 15 dollars per day.

Too fucking much. I have to cut down on that for sure.

By Chestnut + Hazel at June 11, 2019

Notes written on 10/10/2023 @ 10:19 AM,

originally posted on GitHub

I think that I wrote this post while I was working

at Case New Holland. I'm surprised that I was

really spending that much. I

Wonder what I was buying? I don't really remember.

I think that it was mostly energy drinks. I don't

remember my exact hours.

It was overnight is as much as I remember. In

Cameron, MO there isn't really much to eat if

you're up at odd hours.

I'm working on Project 11 for my Web and Software

Development course. I'm not really getting much

done. I'm getting sidetracked

with other things. I'm really amazed that I get so

little done, especially considering that I've had

few other obligations other

than class these past few months. I really

wonder what I've been doing.

Earlier in the course I would have a

lot of fun playing around with our

daily assignments, but, I haven't really

done that in a

while, even though there have been plenty

of opportunities to do so.

155

I don't really remember what those

old posts are about.

156

not off the top of my head anyway.

157

Life is such a nightmare right now. My expenses have increased,

and my income has decreased, and I'm really not seeing any

kind of light at the end of the tunnel.

Life is such a nightmare, but I'm not sure it's really ever been easy.

158

I'm trying to think. Today is Sunday. I feel like I wasted the

entire day. In fact, it's actually already Monday.

159

I kind of blew off one of my professional development projects, the

last one, but I didn't realize that it was required for passing the

course, so I requested a redo of that project.

160

I feel like there is something that I need to do

right now, but I'm not sure what that is.

161

I'm failing MIS 768

I'm going to audit MIS 768

I don't know if the instructor would

allow me to re-take the course, but

even if she did, I don't know if I can

take a risk like that again.

162

I feel like there is something

that I need to do right now,

but I'm not sure what that is.

163

I was thinking about the

aphorism: "the hardest part is getting started"

i thought that it was actually

a quote from Robert Coover's short

story "In be one night and other brief encounters"

but um it's something people actually

say, you know, people say that the hardest

part is getting started.

anyway

the more i thought about it

the more

i thought that

you know

that it could mean two things

on the one hand. it could mean that

the most difficult part in any process is

getting the process started

and also

that

the most difficult part of the process is about to get started.

i'm working on project 9 for my class. i'm almost done.

the hardest part. was actually realizing the fact that I

have to reference my javascript file in the body of my html

file, and not the head. it was working fine, but, um. the

i'm taking a break.

164

I should be starting a new position

soon. Thank god. I've been bored out

of my mind, and kind of losing focus.

it's been about a month and three weeks.

165

I'm so tired. My sleep cycle has shifted over the

past few weeks. I'm still worried about not landing

a position yet. I'm depleting my savings, and for me,

that's not really ideal.

166

I still haven't landed a position yet, and I'm under a

little bit of stress as a result. I can't believe I

didn't get approved for unemployment.

167

best of all the places you've been

are better than the places you haven't been.

and you won't go anywhere new for the foreseeable future.

now and then you will

find something interesting.

and most of all they are more interesting

than the things that you haven't come across.

and you will drive across the country and find new things

that are interesting

and that you will be happy to see and

you will enjoy them.

I know what to do now, like going

forward and stuff. I'm going to say this:

"Yeah, I know a whole bunch of stuff,

all the craziest dirt and everything.

Basically. I have all the information

you need, even the things that other

people don't know, and even the things

that other people couldn't even imagine."

maybe you know the things that you haven't

already learned so you will learn them.

here

and again

you see it over and

over and think that

the new things are

nonsensical, but they

actually make sense.

168

what is one of the things that makes Door Dashing hard?

customers who say they never got their order.

one thing that almost all of the refund fraudsters that I've

had to deal with is that during the drop off, they make

a variation to the original instructions. if they say they

want it to be a contactless delivery, you'll see them standing

right at the door or at the street waiting for there order, or

if they say hand it to me, they ask you to leave it at there door.

169

I don't really have much to write about.

I'm writing because. I guess. I want to keep this

updated, but I really don't have anything to write

about. I had a few interview over the past few weeks,

but, nothing has really materialized.

170

Where are the times

that the people who

where here

are not here anymore

when they left to the other side of the

universe.

171

I removed Steam from my taskbar. Nightmare. I can't get

anything done when I get so distracted by other useless

stuff. This is silly, but I have to stay off there.

There are other things that I could be doing, and should be doing.

The current module in class is WordPress. I had trouble, or,

maybe just hesitation at first, but it's actually a whole lot

easier than I initially thought, so I'm not as overwhelmed as

I was at first. It's not always clear what I'm doing is basically

my issue with WordPress, but, I almost want to say it's the same

way when I make pages using HTML and CSS to make them, it's just

that I've gotten more familiar creating pages by writing them,

and grabbing and dragging is somewhat new.

172

What do I have to do? I don't have any major assignments

due tomorrow, but I have to get these modules on WordPress

done because we are going to move into new content.

173

For some reason I can't seem to really get my thoughts together

to get very much of my course work done. I did get the last two

projects completed, but only after quite a bit of procrastination,

followed by quite a bit of pressure from an impending due date. I'm

not really behind, but I'm not really ahead, and I'm not really

getting ahead.

The pressure to land a position is increasing. It isn't clear to me

where I stand with the temp agency, I did get new hire paperwork, but,

I'm not sure if that necessarily means I have a position, or a paid

assignment just yet. I've only worked with a temp agency a few other

times. Each one is kind of different.

174

Where are the times

that the people who

where here

are not here anymore

when they left to the other side of the

universe.

175

I removed Steam from my taskbar. Nightmare.

I can't get anything done when I get so distracted

by other useless stuff. This is silly, but I have

to stay off there. There are other things that I

could be doing, and should be doing.

The current module in class is WordPress. I had

trouble, or, maybe just hesitation at first, but

it's actually a whole lot easier than I initially

thought, so I'm not as overwhelmed as I was at first.

It's not always clear what I'm doing is basically my

issue with WordPress, but, I almost want to say it's

the same way when I make pages using HTML and CSS to

make them, it's just that I've gotten more familiar

creating pages by writing them, and grabbing and

dragging is somewhat new.

176

What do I have to do? I don't have any major assignments

due tomorrow, but I have to get these modules on WordPress

done because we are going to move into new content.

177

For some reason I can't seem to really get my thoughts

together to get very much of my course work done. I did

get the last two projects completed, but only after quite

a bit of procrastination, followed by quite a bit of pressure

from an impending due date. I'm not really behind, but I'm not

really ahead, and I'm not really getting ahead.

The pressure to land a position is increasing. It isn't clear to

me where I stand with the temp agency, I did get new hire paperwork,

but, I'm not sure if that necessarily means I have a position, or a

paid assignment just yet. I've only worked with a temp agency a few

other times. Each one is kind of different.

178

I managed to get my project finished, although,

not without a lot of procrastination. For some

reason I keep getting sucked-in to playing

computer games. Huge waste of time. Today is

after Labor Day. I had an interview with a temp

agency and a logistics company the other day, but,

I don't know where I stand. I'll follow up when I get a chance.

I get less and less enthusiastic about this

blog as time goes on. Well, maybe that's not totally

true. I guess. I just really have less time for it right now.

179

I'm getting worried about coming up on a

second month out-of-work. I didn't get

approved for unemployment, so, I'm basically

just staying home for now. Not doing anything

other than my course work and. I did a little

day trading yesterday, but, it didn't amount to

much. I didn't lose anything, and that's always good.

Caffeine keeps me up,

but it doesn't give me

motivation. I've been

procrastinating with some

of the stuff for class.

180

Today is labor day and I've stayed

up overnight, and I haven't had any

sleep, and I haven't got any work done.

181

Today is the first day in a long while

that I've been up during the day, where

it wasn't, where I wasn't just carrying

on from the night before. I'm still worried

about the next few weeks and months, since,

I'm not working, but I'm not as stressed out

about it as I usually am, or, as stressed out

about it as I was a while ago. I almost had

an interview the other day, but the recruiter

never confirmed the interview date and time.

I thought about just showing up, but then,

I later thought it would be weird.

182

Today is the first day in a long while

that I've been up during the day, where it

wasn't, where I wasn't just carrying on from

the night before. I'm still worried about the

next few weeks and months, since, I'm not

working, but I'm not as stressed out about

it as I usually am, or, as stressed out about

it as I was a while ago. I almost had an interview

the other day, but the recruiter never confirmed

the interview date and time. I thought about just

showing up, but then, I later thought it would be weird.

183

I missed my appointment with my career counselor

the other day, and I was so tired, that I didn't

show up for class, even though it was just a Zoom

session. Same thing, I was playing Sim City, and

that was an issue, and the other thing was that I

was staying up late trying to set up my GitHub

website, it took forever, and the issue turned

out nothing that I was able to fix, the issue was

that my account was messed up, so I had to create

a new account. I don't know what the specific cause

of the issue was, but as far as I can tell, it had

something to do with the email address that I used

to sign up for an account. It's less likely to get

flagged if you use something like a signup with a

Gmail account. So that's what I did, the other issue

may have been with my account name, which had hyphens.

and it was really long as well.

184

I've been wasting a little bit of time playing

Sim City. Well. It's actually a lot of time that

I've wasted playing the game. I've been in an

unhappy mood these last few days, and I'm not

really in any position to do anything super

interesting. My fortune cookie the other day.

I went out for Chinese food. Said: There are no

bad journeys, only lessons learned. I don't know

if that was supposed to encourage me or what.

185

I'm feeling a little better than I was earlier.

I've applied for a few more roles. a few more positions.

I'm worried about things. about the next few months. I'm

annoyed by how often. like. my plans to get ahead always

seem to hit a brick wall. things just aren't really easy

for me. this is such a headache. such a disappointment.

I'm feeling somewhat discouraged.

186

My head is in a million different places

right now. I'm in such an absolute funk right now.

187

I have my hearing today. yet another nightmare.

I'm frustrated right now. Irritated.

188

I'm so tired. I don't think that I really

did anything today. after the first application,

I went on to complete 2 more, and an assessment.

I went to the buffet around the corner. I don't

know. I feel like I do the same stuff over and

over. but oh well. I guess that's the way it is for now.

I don't know why I didn't but more sodas when

I was at the gas station earlier. Right now

I'm more thirsty than I've ever been. So thirsty.

Guess what? I drank water! it was so good.

I'm in a weird mood.

Everything is kind of a

nightmare right now. like

a real nightmare. I wish

things we easy. or at least. easier.

One thing I made easier for myself

is to keep my keyboard backlight on.

this is nice. since I'm always up at

night. during the day, though, I'm always

working kind of in the dark.

What do I still want? Like. Is there anything

I still want that I've wanted for a while.

189

I submitted 1 application

today. i think one of the

things that kind of makes me nervous

is when there are a number of programs

or applications listed in the post that

I'm not familiar with. A lot of these

positions, or, at least the positions

that stick out to me, have to do with

casino games, or slot machines.

190

I need to look for work, and I need to

find something, I need to land something.

I feel a little bit worried. well. I actually

feel a little more than just a little worried.

I haven't looked for work or applied for a job in

a while.

191

I need to land a job, and I'm

starting to worry about it. I

need something that pays. like

real money.

192

Some things are just too weird.

some coincidences are just too

coincidental. sometimes things

line up in strange ways that seem.

weird. like i wonder how that happened.

193

Version 4 - 7 of my project is

responsive. It fits mobile screens.

194

I was able to find something to eat.

195

It's midnight and I'm really

kind of hungry. I want to go

out to eat, I want to find

something to eat.

196

I don't really have much to write

about. I've just been working on

my coursework and assignments and

projects for my class. I've been

basically goofing off with this

Jennifer Connelly project. All day,

and a few hours from the previous day.

I think that I worked overnight on this.

197

I don't know what to do about my MIS 768

Repository. I'm thinking about dismatleing it

and relocating the material to my main repository.

198

I need to land a job,

and I'm starting to

worry about it. I need

something that pays.

like real money.

199

Some things are just too weird.

some coincidences are just too

coincidental. sometimes things

line up in strange ways that

seem. weird. like i wonder how

that happened.

200

Version 4 - 7 of my project is

responsive. It fits mobile screens.

201

I was able to find something to eat.

202

It's midnight and I'm really kind of

hungry. I want to go out to eat, I

want to find something to eat.

203

I don't really have much to write about.

I've just been working on my coursework

and assignments and projects for my class.

I've been basically goofing off with this

Jennifer Connelly project. All day, and a

few hours from the previous day. I think

that I worked overnight on this.

204

I created an aspect ratio of 8.68 / 6.08

205

I'm not really in a good mood. I'm tired.

I'm cranky. I'm worried about the future

and all that. This is a headache.

206

there were places back there

that I never saw again, and I

thought that there were

places that I had not seen.

The rural carrier associate is a

young woman with a lisp that lingers

long enough to wreck your week, and

fiery jade eyes that burn in your

mind every subsequent week.

I try to buy stamps, twenty is too much for

one stamp, and she can't break bills, and

I can't have them all, I ask to trade stamps,

one for one, she's not sure that's okay,

so she phones a friend; she asks

if I have exact change and I say:

yes! I do.

I'm super tired. I didn't really do

anything today. I attended class,

which is via Zoom, so, it's not like

that's really physically demanding,

but, I'm otherwise really tired.

207

I don't. a little bit of hard stuff.

trouble. this is difficult. nightmare.

208

I woke up at around 2 PM this afternoon.

I was really tired, so I went to the buffet

to go out and eat. I bought and drank a

few energy drinks, but I'm not any more

energized or awake than I was 2 hours ago,

it's 4 PM as I am writing this. I'm thinking

about taking kind of a long shower or

something. doing my homework.

209

I'm trying to think right now.

I'm in a strange mood right now.

I'm irritated about a few things.

210

I'm a little bit hungry right

now, and I want to eat something.

kind of. I want to eat something

from the gas station.

211

I feel like going out and doing

something. Like real. I feel

like going out on a road trip

or something.

212

I don't know what kind of a day this is.

Lazy. I'm feeling lazy. and that's pretty

much it. I'm going to apply for a few more

roles. but I don't know what to look for.

This most recent assignment was really cool. I had fun.

213

these are really

the most boring things

that I can think of

right now.

📮

5892 Losee RD STE 132 PMB 176,

North Las Vegas, NV 89081-6200

📧

info@chestnutandhazel.com

☎

+1-816-724-5293

and everything else is somewhere

else and when

you get there you are more

bored than you have ever been.

214

I'm trying to get my energy

together to get myself to work

on something, but, I'm just not

there yet. I'm tired. I usually

work from maybe 10 PM to early in

the morning, last night I stopped

after being kind of discouraged,

and then, sort of

figured out the issue.

215

I'm incredibly tired. I just came back

from the museum, and I went out and did

a bunch of other stuff as well, but

nothing major, I just went out to eat.

and that's it.

216

Today is my birthday. I booked a visit to

the natural history museum. I actually wanted

to go yesterday, but for whatever reason it

wasn't available. I wanted to go Sunday, but

Sunday wasn't an option. maybe it's not open

on Sunday? who knows. I really don't want to

go anymore. I'm not really feeling okay. I'm

experiencing quite a bit of anxiety about the

future. I don't even want to go to the museum today.

217

I'm already tired compiling this massive poem.

larbleeegomartia Karlleshalrma yormalloria

kenneth

larot

yamat

int

repurposed

squiggly

chris

kathryn

args

txt

sharlilponi

src

eclipsedictionaryfile

dictionaryfile

str

blordanicalimor

min

kly

edu

mis

labwork

elixir

unlv

col

catherine

autoboxes

unboxed

stan

roulette

rand

redo

num

bal

feb

pts

commercialized

jeeze

asadasddsa

csv

ouput

subtotal

doesnt

qwertyuioopppppp

asdfghjkkl

qwertyuiopasdfghjkl

zxcvbnm

overthink

arraylist

volumetric

nectar

magenta

cyan

screwy

billable

detour

london

hahahaha

eurodollars

gustave

flaubert

illiquid

laborious

bollinger

xml

isomers

multidisciplinary

devalue

blog

tweets

exploitative

interoperability

healthcare

informatics

imagery

loopthink

programme

internalisation

monomers

walton

ecosystem

patnaik

norfolk

boeing

microtribes

forbes

init

nsc

htm

vicky

kelly

uber

commoditized

investopedia

midsize

Typology

Amazon Alexa

Alexa

alexa

incumbents

encroachment

rideshare

overused

ransbotham

kiron

gerbert

midsize

investopedia

regulatory

duan

sloan

spira

affordances

blockchain

dispersant

pretrained

gaussian

gpt

website

websites

jablonka

schwaller

smit

fraudulent

siri

susan

alice

bennett

neurosciences

mamonov

peterson

vanguard

218

the previous stanza

is a kind of

dictionary.

219

Sharlika

sharliponi

Tarantula

Doogie

Elephant

Toucan

Pig

Appendia

Appendio

appendiala

apendila dicshonario

appendia theosauriseena

appendia referencia

appendio blormeesa

appendeema bloggienemo

apendorglimorna blorgarlika

aplorika blorglika

Shorna

Shorneena

Shorliga

shorlaga

Shorlaika

Fragola

fragolieee

fragonardee

fraswhaa

fransolina

Florna

Blorna

Clorna

Shlorna

Mlorna

220

It's impossible to get anything done

during the day. for me anyway. I'm about

to go to sleep. and I feel like my

Monday is already gone. total nightmare.

Well. it turned out not to be too bad of a

monday. I went into chinatown and ate a few

sandwiches. but I am tired, and, most of the

monday is gone.

221

Quite a bit of stress. There are a lot of things

on my mind right now. This. is a nightmare. I guess

that the only thing that I have to worry about is my

class, my web development class, and, well, I don't

know what else. Oh man what a total nightmare. I'm

worried. What a disaster. What a nightmare. I'm super

tired. I applied for something through LinkedIn. I want

to go do something. Get out of the house, but I haven't

gone anywhere more than a few blocks away from home. The

gas station. The other gas station. The grocery store.

Such a nightmare. Such a disaster. I'm in a lousy sort of

garbage mood. I sent out a few resumes and applications

through LinkedIn, and I've never done that before, so this

is new. Life is a total nightmare for me right now. I feel

so discouraged. I know that I should be thinking of things,

these difficulties, whatever is going on right now, as an

opportunity. but I'm really discouraged.

Monday and Tuesday are free for me. My birthday is coming

up. I haven't done anything for my birthday in the longest

time. It's just something I haven't celebrated in a while.

I just can't stop thinking about how everything is a disaster

right now. a total disaster. I'm really hoping this is all for

the best. It's just that it might be a while before I'm at that

point, where I can say this all happened for the best. When my

nails are even just a few days long, when they've been growing

for just a few days, or when I haven't cut them for a few days

I find that it's hard, or, maybe just awkward, to type. It's

hard. It's uncomfortable to type when I have just a few days

of nail growth. Job search. nightmare. I'm worried about these

next few months. I'm worried about these next few weeks.

constantly anxious, and I can't really get my thoughts together.

222

I had quite a bit of fun with my most recent class

assignment. I have to figure out what the requirements

for the 3rd project, but I think that everything that

is due tomorrow, all the homework assignments, are

completed. I also have to get around to filing an appeal

of my termination, and I have to think about where to apply

and how to apply for work, and I have to prepare for some

kind of thing regarding unemployment.

223

A nice clean laptop screen is now mine. It's nice. I like it.

I can really see now. I'm really surprised with how good it looks.

I rubbed it with rubbing alcohol, and it's really clean, and

everything looks really visible. Years ago, when I moved to Missouri,

I cleaned my computer with water, and it fucked things up, and I didn't

really have money for a new computer for a while. I still get emails

from coin companies, marketing emails to see if I want to buy anything,

and, the answer is kind of yes, but for whatever reason, I think that

silver coins are sometimes bad luck.

224

What did I work on today? well, the course has a kind of running project

that I'm working on, and that's basically what I worked on today. Visually

speaking, my fourth version of my project, Project 3-4, isn't very different

from my third version of my project, Project 3-3, but for whatever reason it

feels like I spent a lot of time doing the things that I did manage to do.

225

13 22 90 35 12 19 86 26 31 80 55 33 91 50 53 49

52 32 85 95 26 32 15 45 26 26 14 52 36 25 85 59

06 07 11 13 27 36 26 52 36 01 05 06 08 07 25 85

15 45 78 52 63 95 85 74 85 25 63 11 01 20 10 41

227

Visual Studio and GitHub. I have to set those two

things up for my class and coursework. I'm so

hungry right now. I need to get something to eat.

I went out to eat. I thought about heading to

Chinatown and finding something to eat there, but, I'm

just too tired. and at the time I was just too hungry.

I'm so tired. I hung out last night. In retrospect I would

have been better just staying home. Last night was a disaster.

Well, I have a real desk. This is nice. I'm trying

to get all my thoughts together, finding focus.

I like rolling over my 401k into my IRA. I don't

like switching employers, but I like roll overs.

It does give me more control and flexibility with

things. I'm trying to think about worst case

scenarios for the next few weeks to come, for the

weeks and months ahead. One thing I don't want to think

about are those times with things are worse than I thought

they would be in a worst case scenario.

228

What do I do? I got an email from. you know.

the company that fired me stating that I can

request an appeal to my termination. I'm going

to do it, but I have no idea how to approach the

whole thing. This is a headache. I got my final

checks from work, or, well, I saw that they were

issued today, I didn't actually get them, in my

bank account or anything. I've been spending too

much money over the last few days, and my spending

is something that I really have to take down to, you

know, something lower than it currently is. It's hot,

I'm always sweating and I always feel somewhat greasy.

229

There are a few things in life that are just a little

bit too strange. Like what? well, I applied for unemployment

here in Nevada and I see that the last person I contacted

for work was. someone. not here in Las Vegas, maybe a while

ago, but not any more. or maybe. I wouldn't really know.

I've tried to stay away from that part of town. I don't

know what to do about the job search. I want to try using

LinkedIn to look for work. I don't want to do anything too

physically demanding if I can avoid it. How to stay in shape?

I don't really know, I was getting fat anyway.

230

Goat Cheese Quarter Pounder

John Cage

This is a Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese and with EVEN MORE GOAT CHEESE!

Mozzarella Lover

John Cage

This is the Classic Buttery Jack with mozzarella and prosciutto.

Regular Fish & Chips

John Cage

This is pretty much just a regular quadruple serving of Fish & Chips.

Jalapeno Hotdog

John Cage

Your typical all-beef hotdog covered in jalapenos

Mozzarella Sticks

John Cage

This is an order of Mozzarela Sticks inside of a box from the restaurant

chain called Jack in the Box. Where is Jack? these look like Mozzarella

Sticks to me! I'll Never Let Go, Mozzarella! I'll Never Let Go!

Fried Catfish & Coleslaw

John Cage

Fried Catfish and Coleslaw is often considered one of the greatest meals in history.

Fried Prawns

John Cage

These are large shrimps, Prawns maybe, that have been sliced and fried.

Anchovy Pizza

John Cage

Anchovy pizza is the best kind of pizza that is ever made and will ever be made.

Two Breasts & Two Thighs

John Cage

Fried chicken is a true American classic. Maybe you love breasts. maybe you love

thighs. maybe you're thinking of two breasts and maybe you're thinking about two

thighs. eat them. they're yours.

Feta Cheese Big Mac

John Cage

This is your typical big mac with the addition of a slice of greek feta cheese.

Scotch & Soda

John Cage

When you can't handle it straight-up. When neat just really isn't your thing. and maybe

Mr. Tom Collins never seems to hit the spot for you. Well: Scotch & Soda.

Pickle Dog

John Cage

Maybe you love pickles, and maybe you love hot dogs. Maybe you love it when it's

beefier than you thought it would be. No matter what your deal is, you'll love the Pickle Dog.

Quesillo Sourdough Jack

John Cage

Mozzerella? NEVER buy local. Buy Quesillo de hebra!

Roquefort Angus Burger

John Cage

If you really can't stand the smell of Gorgonzola.

Oaxaca Cheese Double Jack Delish

John Cage

When you squeese the cotija and the cotija is a little harder than you expected.

keep squeezing that cotija, and it's still hard. Well, try squeezing the oaxaca. so soft. so tender.

Blue Cheese Burger Baby!

John Cage

Stilton is for Red Coats, and moreover, I have to ask if I look like Benedict

Arnold? DO I! I'M ASKING! AND I EXPECT! A! RESPONSE!

231

I realized that I made a few errors, and there are a few things unfinished with my

Hamburger Project. It's still a work in progress, and I'm really having fun with it.

It's a diversion, but, it's also something important. somewhat. so I'll continue to

work on it here and there.

232

Goat Cheese Quarter Pounder

This is a Double Quarter Pounder with

Cheese and with EVEN MORE GOAT CHEESE!

Mozzarella Lover

This is the Classic Buttery Jack with mozzarella and prosciutto.

Regular Fish & Chips

This is pretty much just a regular quadruple serving of Fish & Chips.

Jalapeno Hotdog

Your typical all-beef hotdog covered in jalapenos

Mozzarella Sticks

This is an order of Mozzarela Sticks inside of a box

from the restaurant chain called Jack in the Box.

Where is Jack? these look like Mozzarella Sticks to

me! I'll Never Let Go, Mozzarella! I'll Never Let Go!

Fried Catfish & Coleslaw

Fried Catfish and Coleslaw is often considered one of the greatest meals in history.

Fried Prawns

John Cage

These are large shrimps, Prawns maybe, that have been sliced and fried.

Anchovy Pizza

John Cage

Anchovy pizza is the best kind of pizza that is ever made and will ever be made.

Two Breasts & Two Thighs

John Cage

Fried chicken is a true American classic. Maybe you love breasts. maybe you love

thighs. maybe you're thinking of two breasts and maybe you're thinking about two

thighs. eat them. they're yours.

Feta Cheese Big Mac

John Cage

This is your typical big mac with the addition of a slice of greek feta cheese.

Scotch & Soda

John Cage

When you can't handle it straight-up. When neat just really isn't your thing. and

maybe Mr. Tom Collins never seems to hit the spot for you. Well: Scotch & Soda.

Pickle Dog

John Cage

Maybe you love pickles, and maybe you love hot dogs. Maybe you love it when it's

beefier than you thought it would be. No matter what your deal is, you'll love

the Pickle Dog.

Quesillo Sourdough Jack

John Cage

Mozzerella? NEVER buy local. Buy Quesillo de hebra!

Roquefort Angus Burger

John Cage

If you really can't stand the smell of Gorgonzola.

Oaxaca Cheese Double Jack Delish

John Cage

When you squeese the cotija and the cotija is a little harder than you

expected. You keep squeezing that cotija, and it's still hard. Well, try

squeezing the oaxaca. so soft. so tender.

Blue Cheese Burger Baby!

John Cage

Stilton is for Red Coats, and moreover, I have to ask if I look like

Benedict Arnold? DO I! I'M ASKING! AND I EXPECT! A! RESPONSE!

233

Chestnut + Hazel Banner Goat Cheese Quarter Pounder Goat Cheese Quarter

Pounder This is a Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese and with EVEN MORE

GOAT CHEESE! Mozzarella Lover Mozzarella Lover This is the Classic Buttery

Jack with mozzarella and prosciutto. Regular Fish & Chips Regular Fish &

Chips This is pretty much just a regular quadruple serving of Fish & Chips.

Jalapeno Hotdog Jalapeno Hotdog Your typical all-beef hotdog covered in

jalapenos Mozzarella Sticks Mozzarella Sticks This is an order of Mozzarela

Sticks inside of a box from the restaurant chain called Jack in the Box.

Where is Jack? these look like Mozzarella Sticks to me! I'll Never Let Go,

Mozzarella! I'll Never Let Go! Fried Catfish & Coleslaw Fried Catfish &

Coleslaw Fried Catfish and Coleslaw is often considered one of the greatest

meals in history. Fried Prawns Fried Prawns These are large shrimps, Prawns

maybe, that have been sliced and fried. Anchovy Pizza Anchovy Pizza Anchovy

pizza is the best kind of pizza that is ever made and will ever be made.

Two Breasts & Two Thighs John Cage Fried chicken is a true American classic.

Maybe you love breasts. maybe you love thighs. maybe you're thinking of two

breasts and maybe you're thinking about two thighs. eat them. they're yours.

Feta Cheese Big Mac Feta Cheese Big Mac This is your typical big mac with the

addition of a slice of greek feta cheese. Scotch & Soda Scotch & Soda When you

can't handle it straight-up. When neat just really isn't your thing. and maybe

Mr. Tom Collins never seems to hit the spot for you. Well: Scotch & Soda.

Pickle Dog Pickle Dog Maybe you love pickles, and maybe you love hot dogs.

Maybe you love it when it's beefier than you thought it would be. No matter

what your deal is, you'll love the Pickle Dog. Quesillo Sourdough Jack Quesillo

Sourdough Jack Mozzerella? NEVER buy local. Buy Quesillo de hebra! Roquefort

Angus Burger Roquefort Angus Burger If you really can't stand the smell of

Gorgonzola. Oaxaca Cheese Double Jack Delish Oaxaca Cheese Double Jack Delish

When you squeese the cotija and the cotija is a little harder than you expected.

You keep squeezing that cotija, and it's still hard. Well, try squeezing the

oaxaca. so soft. so tender. Blue Cheese Burger Baby! Blue Cheese Burger Baby!

Stilton is for Red Coats, and moreover, I have to ask if I look like Benedict

Arnold? DO I! I'M ASKING! AND I EXPECT! A! RESPONSE!

234

Going on a road trip is kind of on my mind right now. but it's not really a

good idea when I think about it. I just got canned. I should be looking for

work. but what kind of work should I be looking for?

235

Totally got canned today. by email. and in this case the nightmare is over,

because the nightmare already just happened. there's like, impending doom, the

moment of doom, and what happens after the moment of doom, and that's where

I'm at right now: post-doom. I don't know what to do. This is a disaster.

Total nightmare. I have no idea about what to do. I worked on one of the other

assignments for my programming class, and it looks really cool. I don't know

what to do work-wise.

236

This last assignment for my software and web development course was

just too fun. It took me forever, but I was able to get everything

working, and I think the iframes below should work. I'm really dreading

going back to work, and I'm also really dreading the idea that my last

day at work is just around the corner.

237

I have no idea what kind of position to be looking for. I really

want to take a nap right now. I don't know what's going to happen

as far as work goes. I have to remember that this could be an opportunity

to do something new, and, that's something I should look forward to.

I don't have a resume. I haven't been to an interview in forever. I don't

know where to begin. This is a nightmare. I was able to track down some

old files on an older laptop that I have. I don't know why this older laptop

is so slow, I bought it last year, but from the very beginning it just didn't

work very quickly. Moving the files took about an hour, and I want to say that

the total number of files was around 20,000 at maybe 200 GB, and I really don't

think that's a lot of stuff to move, it was just from my computers internal storage

to an external storage device. an hour. really.

238

I am already tired of compiling this document

or putting together this massive, epic poem of mine!

tired really tired.

239

Not really feeling all that fabulous. I've been using

some of the dating apps again, but, being on those things

makes me unhappy more often than it makes me happy. They

depress me more than they elevate my mood in any way. This

dating app stuff really makes me unhappy, and maybe that's

the whole idea. I don't want to do it, I want to get off

these dating apps, and I think that I will.

Working and and reworking some of my course projects

turned out to be very enjoyable. I think that I took

it in one direction, and then wanted to go back and

take it in a slightly different direction. I want to

continue to try a few things, but we are already moving

on to new things, and I still want to play around with

it. I think that if I started on it sooner, than I could

have spent more time playing around with it, but I more

or less just started on it this morning.

There are 3 copyright registrations pending,

and 1 trademark registration pending for

Chestnut + Hazel. This should be kind of cool.

I'm really unhappy about all the dating app

stuff. I really want to delete these things.

I'm not happy with them. I don't know what to

do with them, mothball them maybe. I'm really

not feeling well, at all, everything is just a

total nightmare. dread. everything. is not going

well. I don't know what on earth to do about work.

My inclination is to wait until I'm canned before

I do any job search kind of stuff. My suspension

ends on August 8th, and at that point I'll know if

I'm going to get canned, or if I'm going to go back

to work. I haven't done well in the 8 or whatever

weeks I've been at this new location.

and it's not like starting today with any job search

is really going to give me any kind of advantage. 3

or 4 days or whatever is not a huge head start.

240

So Chestnut + Hazel officially has a trademark

pending. It might be a year before I hear anything

back from the US PTO. There are also a few copyright

registrations that I have pending, and in my

experience, those could take about four months to process.

With all the other stuff I have going on, the disasters,

the impending disasters. I'm going to dig into my homework

that's due tomorrow, and see where that goes. there are so

many things going on, so many things going wrong that I

really don't know where to begin. So close. I had these

credit cards on the way to zero, and now this. I'm frozen

right now, not in the sense that I'm immobile, or stuck

in place, but I have things to do that I just haven't

done yet. so. I'm just here.

So I'm working on one of my class projects, and it was

pretty interesting. I spent too much time on this last

thing, working with padding, margins, and borders. I

integrated the new concepts into a previous project,

and created and messed around with some of the buttons

that I created.

241

This chair that I'm sitting on

right now is falling apart

structurally.

242

What a mood I'm in! I don't

really feel all that great

right now. I did laundry, I

cleaned my card. I registered

a copyright and a trademark,

or, it has to be awarded, so I

guess I submitted the applications

for registration. I'm worried about

the prospect of getting canned from

work. Getting canned is something

that I should take as an opportunity,

to do something else, to try something

new, but it's not something I'm really

prepared for. Credit Card wise, I'd be

back in minimum payment mode. I was so

close, and now it all falls apart again.

I need to finish my homework for class.

The thing is. I have no idea what to

do about class if I have to start

looking for work again, because, I

prefer working nights, but it isn't

clear to me what else is out there working

nights.

243

Years ago, like a decade ago really, like ten years ago or more,

I remember wanting to work at a casino, but I never did it, this

was when I was living in San Jose, CA, and there were a number of

card houses in the area, and, I think at the time a new card house

completed construction. I don't really go into casinos, I don't really

gamble, and so I don't really no much about them. Last year when I went

on my road trips from Texas to Michigan I came across tons of casinos,

it's really surprising how many there are, there's not the concentration

of casinos out there like there are here in Las Vegas, NV, but they are

out there, and you see them every so often.

244

This is kind of a headache. I think that I bit off more than I can chew.

I don't know what other things to put into this Epic Adventure Poem of mine.

245

There was one in Michigan, I think, somewhere close to Battle Creek, MI

that I stopped at and checked out, mostly for the restaurants, I stayed

at the less expensive motel across the street. I played a few games of

some kind of card game, but, I don't remember what it was called, or what

it was or what the rules were, I just chatted with the card dealer and

kind of got a feeling of what the role is like.

246

This is a little bit of a nightmare. I can't really think right now.

There are so many things on my mind right now that I'm worried about,

and my thoughts skip from one thing to another. I want to finish my

coursework today, but I also need to finish my course work today.

247

So it's kind of back to square one, I'm kind of back to the drawing

board on the Chestnut and Hazel logo or trademark. Some of the newer

things that I've tried don't really succeed as a favicon, and that really

plays into it. The success or the failure of the design of the trademark

logo hinges upon whether or not it looks nice as a favicon, and there

really isn't much to work with when it comes to a favicon. I'm working

on this design pixel by pixel, by hand, and part of the reason I'm doing

this is to make sure that I can obtain a copyright, and eventually a trademark.

248

Chestnut + Hazel, all characters stylized

Chestnut + Hazel, all characters stylized, the word chestnut is brown,

the plus sign is red, and the word hazel is green

the word chestnut is colored brown, hex value #875941 RGB value (135, 89, 65) HSV value (21,52,53)

the plus sign character is colored red, hex value #7E0113 RGB value (126,1,19) HSV value (351,99,49)

the word Hazel is colored green, hex value #2D910D RGB value (45,145,13) HSV value (105,91,57)

the word Chestnut appears first with the plus sign character to the right of the word Chestnut, the

word Hazel appears below the word Chestnut, and is indented. the letter C in the word Chestnut is

larger than the letters forming hestnut and the letter H in the word Hazel is larger than the remaining letters forming azel.

Chestnut + Hazel, all characters stylized, the word chestnut is brown, the plus sign is red, and the word hazel is green

the word chestnut is colored brown, hex value #875941 RGB value (135, 89, 65) HSV value (21,52,53)

the plus sign character is colored red, hex value #7E0113 RGB value (126,1,19) HSV value (351,99,49)

the word Hazel is colored green, hex value #2D910D RGB value (45,145,13) HSV value (105,91,57)

Chestnut + Hazel, all characters stylized, the word chestnut is colored brown, hex value #875941 RGB value (135, 89, 65) HSV value (21,52,53)

the plus sign character is colored red, hex value #7E0113 RGB value (126,1,19) HSV value (351,99,49)

the word Hazel is colored green, hex value #2D910D RGB value (45,145,13) HSV value (105,91,57),

the word Chestnut appears first with the plus sign character to the right of the word Chestnut, the word Hazel

appears below the word Chestnut, and is indented. the letter C in the word Chestnut is larger than the letters

forming hestnut and the letter H in the word Hazel is larger than the remaining letters forming azel.

249

48 Logos and Logo Elements for Chestnut + Hazel

So Chestnut + Hazel officially has a trademark pending.

It might be a year before I hear anything back from the US PTO.

There are also a few copyright registrations that I have pending,

and in my experience, those could take about four months to process.

With all the other stuff I have going on, the disasters, the impending

disasters. I'm going to dig into my homework that's due tomorrow, and

see where that goes. there are so many things going on, so many things

going wrong that I really don't know where to begin. So close. I had these

credit cards on the way to zero, and now this. I'm frozen right now, not

in the sense that I'm immobile, or stuck in place, but I have things to do

that I just haven't done yet. so. I'm just here.

So I'm working on one of my class projects, and it was pretty interesting.

I spent too much time on this last thing, working with padding, margins, and

borders. I integrated the new concepts into a previous project, and created

and messed around with some of the buttons that I created.

250

What a mood I'm in! I don't really feel all that great right now. I did laundry, I cleaned my card.

I registered a copyright and a trademark, or, it has to be awarded, so I guess I submitted the

applications for registration. I'm worried about the prospect of getting canned from work. Getting

canned is something that I should take as an opportunity, to do something else, to try something new,

but it's not something I'm really prepared for. Credit Card wise, I'd be back in minimum payment mode.

I was so close, and now it all falls apart again. I need to finish my homework for class. The thing is.

I have no idea what to do about class if I have to start looking for work again, because, I prefer

working nights, but it isn't clear to me what else is out there working nights.

Years ago, like a decade ago really, like ten years ago or more, I remember wanting to work at a

casino, but I never did it, this was when I was living in San Jose, CA, and there were a number of

card houses in the area, and, I think at the time a new card house completed construction. I don't

really go into casinos, I don't really gamble, and so I don't really no much about them. Last year

when I went on my road trips from Texas to Michigan I came across tons of casinos, it's really

surprising how many there are, there's not the concentration of casinos out there like there are here

in Las Vegas, NV, but they are out there, and you see them every so often.

There was one in Michigan, I think, somewhere close to Battle Creek, MI that I stopped at and checked

out, mostly for the restaurants, I stayed at the less expensive motel across the street. I played a

few games of some kind of card game, but, I don't remember what it was called, or what it was or what

the rules were, I just chatted with the card dealer and kind of got a feeling of what the role is like.

251

This is a little bit of a nightmare. I can't really think right

now. There are so many things on my mind right now that I'm

worried about, and my thoughts skip from one thing to another.

I want to finish my coursework today, but I also need to finish

my course work today.

252

So it's kind of back to square one, I'm kind of back to the drawing

board on the Chestnut and Hazel logo or trademark. Some of the newer

things that I've tried don't really succeed as a favicon, and that

really plays into it. The success or the failure of the design of the

trademark logo hinges upon whether or not it looks nice as a favicon,

and there really isn't much to work with when it comes to a favicon.

I'm working on this design pixel by pixel, by hand, and part of the

reason I'm doing this is to make sure that I can obtain a copyright,

and eventually a trademark.

253

Chestnut + Hazel, all characters stylized

Chestnut + Hazel, all characters stylized, the

word chestnut is brown, the plus sign is red,

and the word hazel is green

the word chestnut is colored brown, hex value #875941 RGB value (135, 89, 65) HSV value (21,52,53)

the plus sign character is colored red, hex value #7E0113 RGB value (126,1,19) HSV value (351,99,49)

the word Hazel is colored green, hex value #2D910D RGB value (45,145,13) HSV value (105,91,57)

the word Chestnut appears first with the plus sign character to the right of the word Chestnut,

the word Hazel appears below the word Chestnut, and is indented. the letter C in the word

Chestnut is larger than the letters forming hestnut and the letter H in the word Hazel is

larger than the remaining letters forming azel.

Chestnut + Hazel, all characters stylized, the word chestnut is brown, the plus sign is red, and the word hazel is green

the word chestnut is colored brown, hex value #875941 RGB value (135, 89, 65) HSV value (21,52,53)

the plus sign character is colored red, hex value #7E0113 RGB value (126,1,19) HSV value (351,99,49)

the word Hazel is colored green, hex value #2D910D RGB value (45,145,13) HSV value (105,91,57)

Chestnut + Hazel, all characters stylized, the word chestnut is colored brown, hex value #875941 RGB value (135, 89, 65)

HSV value (21,52,53)

the plus sign character is colored red, hex value #7E0113 RGB value (126,1,19) HSV value (351,99,49)

the word Hazel is colored green, hex value #2D910D RGB value (45,145,13) HSV value (105,91,57),

the word Chestnut appears first with the plus sign character to the right of the word Chestnut, the word Hazel appears

below the word Chestnut, and is indented. the letter C in the word Chestnut is larger than the letters forming hestnut

and the letter H in the word Hazel is larger than the remaining letters forming azel.

254

48 Logos and Logo Elements for Chestnut + Hazel

Updating titles to some of my blog posts, mostly just

taking posts that are Archived Content posts and shoving

them into the nearest series of posts, Reflections from

Chestnut Street or Letters from Sanford Street or whatever.

There is the issue of work. I was at two write-ups, and now

I'm on suspension. I don't know what on earth to do, even if,

somehow, I end up keeping my position, there is still the issue

of things not really becoming easier at work. Things just

haven't become easier.

255

Around 2 PM yesterday I stopped at a motel about 100 miles

outside of Las Vegas and stopped to rest. It's 3 AM right now.

I thought about heading home early but there's no key drop off

so I guess I'll finish out my stay. I missed 2 days of work,

this isn't the end of the world, but it's definitely sub-optimal.

I wanted to see the Utah Natural History Museum, but I couldn't

figure out how to get tickets from their website, and 3rd party

websites didn't offer them either. Plus, it wasn't open at 6 AM or

whatever, so I headed back home because I was really in a shitty mood.

I did consider continuing on to Boise, Idaho, thinking that I might

still be able to go in to work, well, I didn't make it. I might try

this again, but who knows.

256

Maybe I'll just say it the way it is.

I'm feeling unbelievably depressed.

Like real bad. An unshakable melancholy

that won't go the fuck away. I'm really

glad I did this because as soon as I get

back to Las Vegas I'm setting up a doctor's

appointment. There's no reason for me to feel

this unhappy. None.

But right now, I don't really know what

to do. I really want to take. Nap but

check in isn't until 230. I could be back

in Vegas by that time.

I'm so unhappy.

It comes out of nowhere.

I don't know what the fuck causes it.

It has to be some kind of chemical imbalance.

If I have no reason to feel sad,

and feel sad out of nowhere,

then there's really no other fucking explanation.

Anyway. Salt Lake City is kind of nice,

between Provo and Salt Lake City there's a

town that really felt like Overland Park, Kansas.

257

That was quick. my phone is now covered in cracks, and it looks like a spider web.

258

That was quick. my phone is now covered in cracks, and it looks like a spider web.

259

The Best Haircut (2023)

Hello Earth! Moon! Mars! & Venus!

What I thought was a haircut turned out

not to be a haircut. it was. actually.

just. hair.

hiding behind the neck.

hair hides behind the neck

and plays

hide and seek.

or maybe

MARCO ! POLO !

no hair is the same as hairless

no hare is a tortoise.

FASTER! slower. FASTER! FASTER! FASTER!

Harder? like the shell of a tortoise?

NO! just FASTER!

My home

is on Audrey Hepburn Street!

where else could I possibly live?

Things I like about my home

foremost among those things I like about my home

is that Audrey Hepburn is always here

and in the neighborhood I like that we have

places Audrey Hepburn likes to eat

places Audrey Hepburn likes to go

places Audrey Hepburn likes to see

260

The Best Haircut (2023) by Kenneth Larot Yamat dba Chestnut + Hazel

"The Best Haircut" is actually a poem about Marianne Shaffer

Letters to Katastrophiena # 6

Publication Date 07/21/2023

I really would like to file a copyright for just

that one poem, rather than having it ride inside The Epic Adventures

of Chestnut + Hazel.

261

I'm trying to think. I have class until noon today, then I go into

work at 6 pm, or slightly after. there is really no time for me to

do anything until the weekend. or, well, my weekend, which is in

the middle of the week.

262

The Best Haircut (2023)

Hello Earth! Moon! Mars! & Venus!

What I thought was a haircut turned out

not to be a haircut. it was. actually.

just. hair.

hiding behind the neck.

hair hides behind the neck

and plays

hide and seek.

or maybe

MARCO ! POLO !

no hair is the same as hairless

no hare is a tortoise.

FASTER! slower. FASTER! FASTER! FASTER!

Harder? like the shell of a tortoise?

NO! just FASTER!

My home

is on Audrey Hepburn Street!

where else could I possibly live?

Things I like about my home

foremost among those things I like about my home

is that Audrey Hepburn is always here

and in the neighborhood I like that we have

places Audrey Hepburn likes to eat

places Audrey Hepburn likes to go

places Audrey Hepburn likes to see

kenneth

what?

what are you working on?

i'm not working on anything.

i know that i should be working on

something, but, i'm goofing off.

well. i'm working on my blog. so

i am. actually. working on something.

are you doing anything next week?

i'm thinking about the salt lake city thing again.

i'm not sure if it's as exciting as you imagine it to be.

so?

if you're trying to enjoy yourself, you should

aim to have the most fun with the least effort.

263

i thought

that it was

entertaining that

you were

in time

for cornflakes

i never really

thought you

liked cornflakes

i thought that

you were more

of a

frosted flakes

kind of person

264

"The Best Stuff is not Stuffing" (2023)

The Best Stuff is not Stuffing

The best things that are for thanksgiving

could be called green bean casserole and

candied yams,

but not stuffing

you see, stuffing is a verb

and not a noun

and therefore not a thing

and therefore cannot be among the best things

because stuffing is a verb and it is not a noun

and therefore not a thing

and as a consequence cannot be among the best things

265

when those things are

changed and transformed into

the new things that

have been or where

or what

have you been

when the test of the

multiple choices

266

hear the things

that have been said

before

and here

are the things that are

written on the back of

where you were when you had been the best

267

how are the best things

that you can think of being

used to be the best of the things

that you think are the less of the

comparison

and that's what the things

you think of as being the best

of the least common

aspects of things you hear

when you taste the

you know what.

268

Lately I haven't felt the really deep sadness

that I've been struggling with for quite a

few months, but right now I feel like it can

head in that direction.

269

One of the pairs of jeans that I bought is

just plain white. They were already dirty by

the time I got home and put them on, but they

are very comfortable for some reason. I think

that dyes can change how cotton fabrics feel,

I'm not sure if there is a difference when it

comes to synthetic fabrics.

Yeah, these jeans are really comfortable.

I'm really surprised with how comfortable they are.

270

I bought two pairs of jeans, two pairs of

pants. three shirts, two of which have

shirt pockets, and two pairs of shoes.

271

I bought a shirt. It's kind of small.

well. Actually. It is small, but it's

smaller than I thought it would be.

272

Kenneth. write this down. Forget about salt

lake city temporarily. Stay local for now. do

some in-person shopping to get out and explore.

273

Lately I haven't felt the really deep sadness

that I've been struggling with for quite a few

months, but right now I feel like it can head

in that direction.

274

Kenneth

what

did you notice anything today

yeah

what did you notice?

tabasco sauce.

and where is tabasco sauce made?

i'm not going to answer that.

yes you are

louisiana

remember that.

anyway. I usually eat my burritos with sweet and sour sauce.

yeah, that bothers me.

why do you care?

i don't.

275

Right now I'm not feeling unhappy,

or angry, or manic, or anxious, or

worried. I'm kind of centered right

now and this is kind of nice.

276

I've been up for about 2 hours, or

what feels like 2 hours, it's actually

only been an hour and a half, but it feels

like I haven't done anything. I tidied up,

and took a shower and did some grooming and

laundry, these don't always feel like real

accomplishments, but they are things that

need to be done, and I honestly want to spend

more time, I want to dedicate more time to

looking good. or at least looking like I actually

put in time to. look more or less. I think I

want to look like I put some thought into it,

and I put some effort into it, but not in a way

that's extremely high-maintenance or anything and

in a way that's clearly not high-maintenance.

277

Maybe to put it another way. I want to look

very nice in a way that is very efficient and

also looks very efficient. One issue I'm having

right now is actually. Pants.

278

I really want to file

a patent for some kind of

useful software program.

I'm failing MIS 768

and I'm trying to salvage whatever

time I've spent and whatever money

I've spent to take the course.

There isn't an absolution clause in

the MIS 768 syllabus that states:

"All your academic sins are washed away

when you file a patent during the course of

this class."

when I say that I'm trying to salvage the situation

what I mean is. Getting a good grade, like an A in

the course would be an asset, but obtaining a patent

after creating something useful from the knowlege I'd

obtained while taking the course would create an actual

asset.

I good grade is an asset in a figurative sense

279

// this was interesting -

// eclipse doesn't really say that this is where the class Book was, but

// i figured that if I moved the files into - or a i moved the

// files, the .java classes into a new package, that it would

// throw errors since the Book.java files are not in

// the same package.

// figurative

280

So many emails and I'm

really nobody notable.

Anyway, pants. I kind of want to

have a 2 week supply of pants, but

I'm not sure I really need that many.

It's just that some times. I don't

really need 14 pairs of pants, It's

just sometimes I don't always have

the time to do laundry every week.

281

I guess what I want in a pair of pants

is a shorter inseam and more of a taper,

without it being a slim fit. The length

of the inseam isn't something I worried

about when I wore boots, but I don't really

wear boots that much anymore so the inseam matters.

282

Kenneth

what

did you notice

anything today

yeah

what did you notice?

tabasco sauce.

and where is tabasco sauce made?

i'm not going to answer that.

yes you are

louisiana

remember that.

anyway. I usually eat my burritos

with sweet and sour sauce.

yeah, that bothers me.

why do you care?

i don't.

283

Right now I'm not feeling unhappy, or angry, or manic,

or anxious, or worried. I'm kind of centered

right now and this is kind of nice.

284

I've been up for about 2 hours, or what feels like 2

hours, it's actually only been an hour and a half, but

it feels like I haven't done anything. I tidied up, and

took a shower and did some grooming and laundry, these

don't always feel like real accomplishments, but they are

things that need to be done, and I honestly want to spend

more time, I want to dedicate more time to looking good.

or at least looking like I actually put in time to. look

more or less. I think I want to look like I put some thought

into it, and I put some effort into it, but not in a way

that's extremely high-maintenance or anything and in a way

that's clearly not high-maintenance.

285

Maybe to put it another way. I want to look very nice

in a way that is very efficient and also looks very efficient.

One issue I'm having right now is actually. Pants.

So many emails and I'm really

nobody notable.

Anyway, pants. I kind of want to have a 2 week

supply of pants, but I'm not sure I really need that

many. It's just that some times. I don't really need

14 pairs of pants, It's just sometimes I don't always

have the time to do laundry every week.

I guess what I want in a pair of pants is a

shorter inseam and more of a taper, without it

being a slim fit. The length of the inseam isn't

something I worried about when I wore boots, but I

don't really wear boots that much anymore so the

inseam matters.

286

It's midnight, lunchtime, and I feel kind of unhappy.

There is a brick inside my chest. A stack of bricks. I

don't know what causes this. It oscillates. My mood

oscillates from irritated to unhappy. Over and over. Sad

to grouchy and grouchy to sad and over and over and I have

no idea why.

287

To the Divine One who

holds dominion over

all those things

that can and usually do go wrong

for me

yesterday was agonizing

and

i'm sure there's a time

and place

and purpose

for everything

i'm sure there are times when it's

appropriate to torture

kenneth

but i'm also sure there's an

appropriate time

to show kenneth mercy

things have been more or less downhill since february of 2022, and,

maybe things have become a little bit better since i left texas and

came back to nevada, but it has been at kind of a snail's pace and i

honestly consider this a form of torture. i think. that. the time for

delivering mercy. unto kenneth. is at hand. divine one.

anyway. i registered the domain katastrophiena.com and um, i think i'll

finally get around to registering a few trademarks.

288

// the backslash is called an escape character needs to add a backslash

// I remember that there was something about file paths here,

// when there has to be double backslashes.

// I'm following along with the video, but rather than

// deleting the code, I'm just going to comment it out for now.

// D:\GitHub\MIS76810032024Sprg\src\MIS768\edu\improvedbooktestparttwo.csv

// I don't know why it's not showing up in eclipse, or not showing up right away.

// something about the file paths. I found them.

289

I didn't get much sleep this morning. I was busy

setting up the new domain and emails for it and

doing a little writing that I found that it was

noon before I even got a chance to lay down and

rest. So I'm at six hours of sleep for the day

which is a lot less than usual but I'll see how

this goes.

The fact that I had so many energy drinks the day

before may have also played into it as well. It's

hot. Really hot, and it's hot enough that the AC in

my car accomplishes almost nothing when it's running.

I don't remember it being this hot the last time I was

in Vegas five years ago.

290

Some of the things that you think will be

amazing, will actually be more boring that you think.

291

Some of the things that you think

will be amazing, will actually be

more boring that you think.

292

No ideas but inside

every idea is a new idea

and there are shells of new ideas

and there are no ideas but inside

things called brains and there are no

images except in a PNG format and

she was not wearing any panties and

for one reason or another I did not

make a move on her.

293

This is the way it goes. and this

is the way it will always be.

and this is the wonder that's keeping

your thighs apart: I carry your panties.

I carry them in my left pocket!

294

Anyway, I'm blank right now. I can't

really think about. I can't really

figure out what to do. I don't really

know what I would do in the event that

I had to, or would have to look for a

new job. I really don't. I don't really

even have a resume. I think. I haven't

really been motivated to look for anything

new, and I haven't really been interested

in looking for anything new.

295

Before I left Arlington I applied for and

received an offer for an outside sales role.

I don't know if it's still referred to as

outside sales. I didn't take it because it

would have. I wouldn't have been able to go

to college and work. The scheduling wouldn't

work. That one incomplete semester set me back

ten thousand bucks, and, in retrospect I probably

should have taken the job. I remember seeing their

headquarters building in Nashville during that first

road trip through the Midwest. I can't really do

anything this year. I'm so damn far behind.

Yeah, I don't really know what I would

do if I had to start looking for work again.

I did take a look the other day, but, I didn't

send out any applications, and, no resumes since

I don't have one. There was one opening that

really caught my eye, but I kind of just want to

stay where I'm at and see what develops. If I

were to get canned I'll just take it as an

opportunity to try something new.

296

I'm trying to figure out where to start.

I'm thinking that I should look at a number

of positions, and seeing what qualifications

are required, and then seeing what kind of

educational or technical or vocational

training I need. I'm really kind of averse

to working during the day.

297

This is the last day of the work week.

That went really fast. It usually doesn't

go by that fast. I did sign up for

overtime this week. A half shift in the

middle of my weekend, and that's both a

good thing and a not-so-good thing. It has

positives and negatives. On the one hand it

breaks my weekend, but on the other, it doesn't

lengthen my workweek the way it would if it were

at the beginning or at the end of my workweek.

I've been thinking about going somewhere,

not anywhere too far, but I'm not really

sure if I should or not.

298

i imagined you called me

and asked me to coffee

i imagined zero things i'd rather do

than have coffee with you

299

This is the last day of the work week.

That went really fast. It usually doesn't

go by that fast. I did sign up for overtime

this week. A half shift in the middle of my

weekend, and that's both a good thing and a

not-so-good thing. It has positives and

negatives. On the one hand it breaks

my weekend, but on the other, it

doesn't lengthen my workweek

the way it would if it were

at the beginning or at the

end of my workweek.

I've been thinking

about going somewhere,

not anywhere too far, but

I'm not really sure if I should

or not.

300

i imagined you called me

and asked me to coffee

i imagined zero things i'd rather do

than have coffee with you

301

I went to the buffet yesterday.

I got a fortune cookie and I feel

like fortune cookies are my, secondary

of course, but almost a second primary

reason for going to the buffet. I was

disappointed with what it said because

it didn't feel like it really meant

anything to me. it said something like:

an optimistic heart clears the path to

victory. and I'm not even sure how that's

relevant to me.

My work week isn't that long.

I work four days a week. nights.

My work

week isn't

that

long.

302

here you are again. I see you.

you are looking at me, but guess what!

I AM ALSO LOOKING AT YOU!

303

It's the last work

day of the week.

304

These Facebook memories feel

weird to look at. Fort Smith,

Arkansas; Azle, Texas; Beaverlick,

Kentucky; Holladay, Tennessee; Cameron

Missouri; Sunnyvale, California.

It's weird because maybe life really

does happen in cycles. I thought

about taking a road trip the

other day, not because I

wanted to, but out of

frustration, to kind

of blow off steam.

I realized that I

really don't go anywhere

or even get out of the house

unless I'm frustrated with something.

305

Well,

I put it all in an index fund,

and,

I'm just going to leave it where it is.

306

I don't think I created a good

faith violation with my IRA, but

I'm not really when I'll know for

sure. Well, two days from now I guess.

I'm going to day trade tomorrow, but

I'm going to take it slow, play it safe,

and not let my emotions get the better of me.

307

not sure but there

are more spiders than there are

insects in the mouths

of birds that fly

around and eat spiders

and other insects. it's true!

// i couldn't see the csv folder that was being created, it was being filtered out

// so i removed all filters, and now I see everything.

// D:\GitHub\MIS76810032024Sprg\src\MIS768\booktest.csv

// for whatever reason this doesn't seem to be showing up in my eclipse like in the video. in the class.

// https://unlv.hosted.panopto.com/Panopto/Pages/Viewer.aspx?id=c65b75ac-c935-4946-bc8d-b117002f504a&start=0

I'm thinking about what

to do about my IRA, like,

I'm thinking about what I

should do next. Now that

I've closed out my position

in VFC, I can really do

something else. I'm not here

trying to grind my way into a

profit, or, out of a loss or

whatever. I'm irritated because

I spent so much time trying to

make it work, and now it's just over.

308

On the one hand I'm thinking that

maybe this is the point where it

would have turned around, and I

could have existed without a loss,

or, even have made some money, on

the other hand, VFC could just as

easily have dropped to 8.00 a share,

in fact, I think I was strategizing

on how to deal with that exact situation,

but, then it started turning around.

What did the fortune cookie say?

"The universe is aligning

to bring you a soulmate connection."

and I'm just thinking:

yeah, sure it is.

When I think about how that all

turned out, like, I would have

been better off just getting a

second job or something, but that

wouldn't work either because I'm

really just too tired to work two jobs.

309

I've cleaned

up my car quite a

bit, but I still

have quite a bit of

stuff in there that

I don't know what to do

with, or that I haven't

made a decision on how to

deal with. I had shoes and

clothes in there that I hadn't

taken out for months.

310

when you see the deserted

places that have been destroyed

the places that have been abandoned

after being destroyed

there will be more

places that will be built

after other places are

destroyed.

new places will be built and

new places will come into

come into

existence

after the other places

no longer exist

311

I haven't bought a new computer game,

and I don't really anticipate buying a new computer game.

this

was a spam

message that

I put on here

to give an example

of the

312

This is a nightmare.

I don't know why I say that all the time,

but really

this is a nightmare.

I'm trying to track down all the writing I've

done, the this or that, and complie it all

into a single epic poem of such Epic-ness that

you know: it will be epic!

but it's a nightmare. I'm looking at the letters from

washburn road, and I remember I had a series or sequence

before that one, and a sequence before that.

312

Can you send pictures of whatever

it is you are looking at because I can't

quite picture in my head the exact thing

that you are describing to me.

313

So after cleaning up all of the posts that were flagged,

I got another notice that the issue has been flagged again,

and so I have to spend time looking through my blog again

and figure out where all the offending posts are.

This is somewhat difficult given that there are so many

posts for me to look through.

314

So it's everything after the Letters from Sanford Street

that I can add to this Epic Poem of the Epic Adventures of

Chestnut + Hazel.

315

Here are the best of the

worst of the last of the

newest and the most recent

of the latest and the greatest

and the most trending stuff

and if you slay when you

get things done or maybe things

you try to do fall flat or

maybe you slay when you fail

or maybe you do well or maybe

you

don't do what you think about

doing when the best of the

orange juice turns into a horse

the size of a tangerine.

316

I think that everything

with my blog has been taken

care of in terms of content

decency or content restrictions,

and so I guess I was able to put

the ads back on my blog. I finally

finished it. It wasn't that hard or

anything. I don't know why I didn't

finish it for several months. The ads

have been of since March 16th, and it's

May 16th. There were several posts that

I had to fix, and I think that I was

debating between just making minor

edits to each post, or just making

entirely new posts.

They went to the store

and they bought a bag

of fruits and with the fruits

they made a bunch of different

drinks depending on what kind

of fruits they had

if they had oranges they

would make orange juice

and if they had grapes

they would make grape juice.

317

and I have to ask if you

knew who the people were

who changed the fruits into

different kinds of drinks

if they knew that grapes

could become grape juice

and pomegranates could

become

pomegranate juice

did they

know or

did they

not know

318

These are where

the oranges are turned

into the paste

and the pulp

becomes part of the orange

juice

and the lemonade

and

the fruit punch makes

things and drinks that you

can enjoy.

These are the drinks that

are enjoyable to drink.

319

Project Proposal:

To create a program that automatically creates

trading tickets for a security, for example, buy

and sell orders for shares of an exchange traded fund.

A user would only manually enter the first order, either to

buy or sell a security, the program would populate and submit

a new ticket based on the fulfillment of the previous ticket,

the chain of tickets would continue until the user decided to

cancel the chain.

Another application of this program would be to serve as a

treasury management solution.

320

There's a Little Caesars Pizza close to where I live.

I went there a few times to get pizza, and I want to

say that the last two times I went there, nothing was

Hot-N-Ready, so I would go to the grocery store, or

7-11, or something, I don't remember exactly; I clearly

didn't starve to death. Anyway, I went again today, and,

not wanting to leave empty-handed, I decided to place my

order through the Little Caesars app first, and then head

over there, and it worked. There's the option to pay through

the app, and the option to pay in person, and there is also a

guest check out, that way I didn't have to set up an account

or anything. I really wasn't in the mood to set up an account,

or enter my credit card information into the app or whatever.

I ordered a nicer pizza that I would ordinarily buy from

Little Caesars.

321

What Was Originally Here?

I don't remember what was originally here

but whatever it was, I guess it must have been

interesting. There were a lot of pictures and

screenshots of this or that. I don't know what

to do with all of these photographs I'm amassing.

I took of all of the photographs, and saved them.

but I don't know what to do eventually. Where

to put them or post them.

322

Background and the needs:

This program is needed because there are many securities

that are difficult to trade because they are illiquid as

a result of large bid and ask spreads, or because they lack

volume.

The goal is to reduce spreads while increasing volume.

Another need is due to the fact that manually performing this task

is laborious and prone to error.

323

but i don't really know if i really want to deal with ONEQ.

There is really a whole lot of bull shit on a lot of these total

market index funds, and i really don't want to deal with a lot of them.

stupid. stupid. I know. there's just a lot of shitty ones on the index.

zombie ticker symbols on the index. some of them never fall off the

index. well. i don't know. a lot of them are garbage.

I did manage to take care of a few things with my old. With my 401(k).

and that was kind of nice. I don't know. what else to do. there were a

few student loan, student aid, and student grant related stuff for school.

I don't recall. exactly what the deadline is for the application period.

I want to say that it is.

324

the needle is full of

gems and if you are

pricked, you will surely

die. don't prick yourself

don't die

try not to get yourself

killed while

you are repairing the

rips on your shirts

and repairing the

rips on your jeans

or the rips on

your pants.

325

I guess my day was okay, I did a bunch of

stuff on the las vegas strip today, but at

some point i had trouble finding where I parked my car.

326

If there is no overtime this week

I kind of want to do something. I don't

know what, but I want to do something. but

then again. I also kind of don't want to do

anything. I don't really know. I think about

things that I want to do. Things that I enjoy

doing. and sometimes I'm not really sure that

there are any. I have this idea for a road-trip,

and it's basically Las Vegas to Carson City to

Salt Lake City and back.

It's the same distance as the Louisiana Road Trip

I took back in 2022, and I remember what a disaster

that turned out to be, but I went on a whole bunch

since then and they just weren't as much of a disaster,

so. I'm kind of one-way-or-another. I don't really know.

Question Number One:

Do I really want to go on a long ass drive?

Question Number Two:

Do I really want to stay in bed all weekend?

I just don't have the same kind of stamina and endurance

I had just a few years ago. I really don't. and I really

don't want to take any huge risks. at the same time, I'm

just kind of not in any kind of good mood. I don't know if

going on a long drive will alleviate that or anything.

327

Your initial [Buy/Sell] Trade ticket for [Security] has been

submitted at the following price [Limit Price] and quantity [Quantity].

Subsequent orders will be automatically generated and submitted contingent

upon the fulfillment of the previous order, with buy limits and sell limits

based on the Average True Range, Bollinger Band Width, and Average Directional

Index entered on the initializing ticket.

Sell orders will be generated with a limit of [Calculated Amount] above the previously filled ticket

Buy orders will be generated with a limit of [Calculated Amount] below the previously filled ticket

[ User Input Element [Accept and Submit] [Override and Submit] [Start Over] ]

328

Think about how you

on the basis of your

skills and your mastery

of the nonsense of being

the best of the greatest people

in the entire universe

think about how you

on the edge of the universe

how you

on the fringe of the tablecloth

and waste the best of all your

orange juice reserves

the orange juice

is very special

the orange juice

is also

old

and pale

think about the best of the taste of all

the orange juice and how

each one of your balls

is the size

of a tangerine.

329

is either of your

testicles

individually

the size

of a tangerine?

or is your ballsack

when taken together

as a whole

a ball sack the size

of a

tangerine?

I saw one guy kicking

the other guy

in a ballsack the size

of a tangerine.

is your testicle sack

the size

of a

tangerine?

330

This post is about as

sexual a post as it will

ever be and it will be

in your mind

extremely risqué and

you will tell everyone

you know how nasty it is.

331

Step 3

[Ticker Symbol] [Buy/Sell] [Order Quantity] [Limit Price] [Ticket Status]

[ HFH.P Buy 1 86.86 Open ]

Step 4

[Ticker Symbol] [Buy/Sell] [Order Quantity] [Limit Price] [Ticket Status]

[ HFH.P Buy 1 86.86 Filled ]

Step 5

[Ticker Symbol] [Buy/Sell] [Order Quantity] [Limit Price] [Ticket Status]

[ HFH.P Sell 1 86.89 Open ]

Step 6

[Ticker Symbol] [Buy/Sell] [Order Quantity] [Limit Price] [Ticket Status]

[ HFH.P Sell 1 86.89 Filled ]

Step 7

[Ticker Symbol] [Buy/Sell] [Order Quantity] [Limit Price] [Ticket Status]

[ HFH.P Buy 1 86.87 Open ]

Step 8

[Ticker Symbol] [Buy/Sell] [Order Quantity] [Limit Price] [Ticket Status]

[ HFH.P Buy 1 86.87 Filled ]

Notes: this sequence is based on + 00.03 to Sell orders and - 00.02 to

Buy orders for first issue preferred shares for the security HFH

332

I slept for something like 3 hours and

I feel fully rechanged. This is really weird.

Usually I'm dead tired even if I stay asleep

an hour before I start work, and that's

usually a hell of a lot of hours of sleep.

333

Trying new things. Well, I want to buy a new

computer game, but none of the ones I'm looking

at are games that I'm familiar with, and I'm not

even really sure that I'll enjoy them. Why or why

would it not matter? Who knows.

334

I've decided not to go on any kind

of road trip this week. There isn't

any overtime, but there are other

things that I can keep myself occupied

with for these next few days off.

Well, I guess I spoke too soon,

there was a short extra shift

available. So I signed up for it.

335

I was up most of the day. I went to

get pizza. I played Civilization 6.

I really only play Civilization 6 as

Phillip the Second of Spain. I left

work early yesterday. I capped out on

Paid Time Off, but for how long? I have

no idea. I hope I didn't cap out for the

year. The allocation is about 2 hours per

week, so it's been about 40 hours I've

used, and that sounds about right, but

I'm surprised that I've used it all already.

336

I don't take very many pictures.

I haven't taken very many pictures

ever, but I guess I just haven't been

anywhere new, or, maybe I just haven't

thought to take any pictures of anything

I've seen recently. The photo upload

quality on Blogger is kind of garbage.

337

I left work early twice this week. One day I took VTO,

and the other day I took PTO. I went to a buffet in

Chinatown, and I ate only about 2 or 3 plates of food, and then left.

I've been feeling kind of discouraged about how much

progress I've made paying down my credit cards,

because I haven't really made any progress paying

down my credit cards, but then I remembered that it's

only been two weeks since April, so I've only been at

it for two weeks.

338

The other day the dogs

took my athletes foot cream,

and I think they took it again today.

339

After setting up my phone fully,

it seems to be working better than

it had. This new phone seems to work

better than my previous phone. The

connection seems to be better than

it was earlier, so I guess it's not

that bad, maybe the only issue was

setting it up.

340

How can a person have athlete's food, and.

well, sometimes a person develops athelet's balls.

and the balls

are in a sack

that's the size

of a tangerine!

341

How can a person have athlete's food, and.

well, sometimes a person develops athelet's balls.

and the balls

are in a sack

that's the size

of a tangerine!

342

Revision Notes:

D:\GitHub\MIS76810032024Sprg\src\MIS768\edu\\unlv\mis768\kly\individualassignment3\redo\ParcelTerminalDemo.java

I have a new phone, my old phone cracked and I've gotten

around to replacing it. I haven't changed service providers.

It's horrible. I can barely connect my phone to anything.

The connection is terrible. I don't know what the hell to

do. Absolutely horrible.

343

A while ago I was donating

stuff to the thrift store in

an effort to get rid of anything

that I didn't really need, or at

least, get rid of anything I didn't

think that I would need, and I think

I donated a set of unopened wood-chisels.

I didn't really need them because I really

didn't think that I would take up wood-working

or anything, and I'm not taking up

wood-working or anything, but I recently

came across a use for them, and when I

looked for them, I couldn't find them, and

realized that I had donated them a while back.

I was going to use the wood-chisels to shape the

tree in the yard. Nothing major, just chip away

at some of the knobbing that develops when stray

branches are removed.

I got rid of most of the stray

branches with a hatchet, a throwing

axe, and I bashed some of the knobs

on the tree using a hammer.

344

This is where the

lucky ones and the

unlucky ones

eat the oranges and

place the best of the worst

and the pomegranates

are opened up and

you like persimmons but

in my opinion, persimmons really aren't

all that great.

345

I stil don't have the slightest clue what.

That's the thing. I have no idea what I

was searching for. There was something

that I wanted to see if I forgot or not, but

I have no idea what it was or what it is that

I should be looking for.

I put in an order for a new phone,

and

I'm in the process of deleting my OKCupid account.

the issue is that the delete button doesn't work.

and so

I'm not able to delete it.

346

// resets the text color

// formats the color of the text to be green and bold.

// String invisible ="\ u001b

// 38;5; + n + m + n";

347

There's something that I think I

should take care of, but I have no

idea what it is. I don't know what

it is. I'm sure it will come to me later,

but I have no idea what it is, there's

just something that I think I'm forgetting

right now.

348

// this is the main argument

// formats two places to the right of the decimal

// formats text red and bold

349

I got rid of a pile of coins,

loose change, at the grocery store

earlier today, I think it turned out

to be about one dollar and fifty cents

or so. I have work later today. This

week I signed up for a few extra shifts,

but there were only half-shifts available,

and I'm kind of happy about that. I just

haven't had a ton of energy for full-length

extra-shifts. Even though, obviously, it's

better to have a whole shifts pay rather

than just a half-shifts pay, I'm not too

sure how much I'm worried about all of that right now.

350

these are a few of the things that I like the best

and when they are always with the next

of the best of the worst of the nearest

and when they come over to the end of the

chickens feet are cooked in a box.

351

I don't really

have much to write

about these days.

I've been meaning to

re-monetize my blog,

and I did a little work

on that, but, there is a

lot of reviewing and stuff

that I have to do. Most of

the time I just erase

whatever was there before,

post it somewhere else,

and then write something

new where the old post was.

I don't really make a whole lot of

money blogging, so it's not critically

important that I re-monetize. The main

issue is just making everything look

more professional.

352

These are the things that you are thinking about

when you were sitting on the toilet

and then remembered later when you

were hanging out at the urinal.

you can make thing easier for

yourself or you could potentially

make things more difficult and

listen to what you've been doing.

I want to see things escalate in a way

that is more interesting than the way

they've currently been. I haven't

been very motivated and I think that

things are just more or less useless as

they have ever been.

it's not that my life has been uneventful

because my life is usually uneventful

I just don't really have anything to write

about. everything

seems to be a repetition of things that

have happened before, and documenting

the present is often just a reiteration of

what has happened in the past. things that

are happening now are just things that

have happened before, and are happening

again.

in so many ways i just haven't been

particularly motivated

in so many ways i've just lost interest

in so many things.

i've been losing motivating

and i've

been losing interest.

353

five of them were

eaten alive by the scariest monster in the

whole wide world! it was. the alligator of evil!

// this is the demo class

// public class ShippingCalculatorDemo

// Mamonov

// Peterson

// I figured out why it was there,

// I was reusing code from the Create

// transcript and it auto imported.

// I have no idea why this is here.

354

I've been experiencing an

elevated level of stress.

I don't know what it is. The

whole time I've been in Las Vegas

I've been experiencing stress and

fatigue. I really don't know what's

causing this. I've tried to make changes

like drinking more water, and I've noticed

a slight improvement, but, a very very

slight improvement. I've been drinking

slightly less soda, but still quite a bit of it.

I don't know what else to do.

355

As far as taking any road-trips goes,

I haven't really planned anything or

made any definite commitments to go on

one. I just have that idea of a road-trip

to Carson City then Salt Lake City and

then back to Las Vegas.

357

I did a minimal amount of

working on my blog today.

I changed a few of the titles

on the Sanford Street series,

just a few posts where the

title was [NUMBER] Sanford Street

to Letters from Sanford Street # [NUMBER]. I've

been meaning to do all of them, but it honestly

really doesn't matter. It doesn't look like ads are

completely removed from my blog, it just looks like

they are limited in some way, but it isn't clear to

me how they are restricted. It's strange that my blog

is flagged for being adult content because most of this

is all text. It's not like I have pornographic videos and

pictures on here.

358

here is where we met

the other day in the

here is where me is

here is where we met the

other day when you and I were

living in a universe an alternate universe.

06 21 03 11 48 78 15 15

20 08 09 19 15 48 26 36

11 04 07 07 95 62 12 23

23 08 01 20 65 89 32 21

01 02 03 06 09 06 12 45

04 09 19 01 19 20 05 18

16 09 05 03 05 12 67 89

15 06 98 76 45 34 23 09

19 08 09 20 63 07 56 34

09 08 09 01 05 20 08 09

19 19 08 09 20 15 85 01

07 87 56 12 02 39 48 17

06 21 03 11 09 14 07 01

04 09 19 01 19 20 05 18

05 22 05 18 25 04 01 25

09 19 01 03 01 20 01 19

20 18 15 16 08 05 09 12

09 09 21 21 27 57 23 96

79 23 15 26 37 01 98 12

and then we thought that we would

see eachother again but we never did

or at least. it was me who never saw you again.

359

One thing that created a bit of anxiety

for me was the Chase Checking Account glitch

where payments were being processed twice.

I actually didn't

notice the issue at first.

When payday hit, I saw that my

checking account balance went up,

but not as much as I expected,

especially considering how much

overtime I worked that week. I

figured that I had a bunch of

outgoing payments and transfers

since I usually schedule outgoing

payments or transfers on a payday,

and that it was simply due to that,

and I really didn't look into it any further.

The other reason no alarm bells went off in my

mind is because the transaction that was

processed twice was approximately the same

amount as a few transfers and payments that

I was sure were going to process around that

time that I made, so I really just thought

that it was the payments and transfers that I made.

I was nevertheless stressed out because I started

to feel that maybe I didn't really plan correctly.

or something. Anyway, I saw a prompt by Chase about

the double transaction glitch, and, what do you know,

it turns out that I was a victim of the Chase Double

Payment Processing glitch.

360

when we met

we said to eachother

i think that you look familiar

to me.

09 12 15 22 05 12 15 23 05 08 05 18 01 19 19 55 88 77 12

09 06 21 03 11 15 04 21 16 20 15 04 05 12 15 23 01 25 12

07 15 04 19 01 22 05 13 05 87 65 05 12 15 23 10 39 37 12

90 05 02 06 09 01 05 12 15 23 51 52 53 56 54 48 58 36 59

05 12 15 23 05 18 25 14 18 33 20 18 42 15 18 81 10 19 13

08 09 20 20 09 14 07 01 14 01 12 12 20 09 13 05 12 15 23

I don't know what you

thought about the new frog, but

the new frog thought that you were

a nice person BEFORE YOU HAD HIS LEGS FOR LUNCH!

361

// initializes the package count.

// This is no longer being used now that the calculated items are calculated.

// there is a point where a person might simply give up.

// final String THE_PLACEHOLDER = "PLACEHOLDER";

// this is used for things that

// I will calculate later, with a calculator

362

My main short term goal is to

get my credit cards paid off before

the end of August. This has been my

goal since the beginning of the year,

and I think it's a realistic goal. The

end of August is when my student loan

repayments start, and I don't want to

be crushed by student loans and credit

cards at the same time.

363

// maybe it makes sense to be = keyboard.nextDouble();

// the width of the parcel

// the length of the parcel

// the weight of the parcel

// the dimensional weight of a package to be

// shipped, based on the dimensions of the package.

364

Well, I wonder if someone

is helping me out here, but,

who knows. I want to say

someone is obviously helping

me out, because something

kind of funny just happened.

365

I want to write something

here, but I'm not sure what

to write, and it's not for a

lack of things to write, it's

just that I have no idea what

I should write about,

considering the number of

things that I could write about.

367

I know that it's just cookies, but they don't know that.

you know. it could have been anything. it could have been

anything it really could have.

I don't really have very many opportunities

to write down what's going on, or how things

have been. There's just other stuff I've been

doing. I've been playing computer games and

stuff. tangerine

I have to set aside time to re-monetize my

blog and get the ads back up, they've been

taken down due to some obscenity related

complaints, but I just haven't gotten around

to remedying the issue.

368

I still have to finish cleaning up

my blog. There was a signup for overtime

that came through, but I missed it by two

hours. This has happened a few times, but,

I guess it's not as important as it used to

be. I mean, I guess I don't need the overtime

money as much as I used to. Well, that's not

really true. I always need the overtime

money as long as I have bills to pay.

369

I haven't had a phone break in a while,

but a few hours ago I dropped my phone

and the screen cracked. This is a headache.

370

Bananas

and the making of here is where

they go and then

they sell the best of the oranges

and the strawberries

cannot be more than the blueberries

there were more blueberries

and

muffins were

made as a result.

371

There have been issues before with

posting pictures to my blog where,

the sizing is all messed up, and the

picture spills out into the left column.

372

this is where the compendium

of things is and I think that

you were missing a

373

still deleting old files

from my Google Drive

and cleaning things out

i want to upload some pictures

and upload some old text files

too

i think the bulk of what i

have there on my Google Drive

are music files i saved

when deleting everything

on my computer

i uploaded all of my

stuff and wiped my drive

clean

374

I got a minimum amount of

stuff done during the week.

I almost want to say I got

nothing done during the week.

I don't know. I just didn't get

much done. I played on the computer.

I dealt with some money orders that

I've had sitting around, and I did a

few things with my investments. Well,

my retirement investments anyway. I don't

have any non-retirement money right now. I

have to get started on my taxes, and I have

to go donate things to the thrift store.

I'll do that next week.

375

right now I am very tired and I don't

think that anything will get any better

and things will only get more amazing.

things will turn around for me in a major

way and things will get better and everything

will work out and I will thrive and I will do well.

and I will be happy with myself. and I will be pleased

by what I accomplished.

376

Something interesting came in the mail today; it was

marketing mail for business checking accounts from

Citibank and US Bank, and they were addressed to Chestnut & Hazel.

I wouldn't mind setting up business checking accounts for Chestnut + Hazel,

but I really don't have any steady income from Chestnut + Hazel yet.

377

I have to tell you this because

it may be

relevant to

the question

You seek to answer and it may

be what you

need to know

to satiate the

obsessions that

are eating away at your mind and

every thought

you have:

GUESS WHAT!

BUTTER! IS!

NOT THE!

ANSWER!!!

378

when there is mail in the mailbox and

there is new mail in the mailbox and there

are letters that can be read and there are notices

from where you are and where you are not.

and you were happy with what you've done and

how you did it and where you did it and.

379

I made an effort set up an account to self publish a book.

It would be the Chestnut Street series. I have to take a

look at it and see what changes I would make to the text.

It's midnight. I'm hungry, and I don't know where to go to eat.

I went to the Cannery Casino to eat at the Victory Cafe,

but it wasn't open. Google Maps said it was open 24 Hrs,

but I guess that wasn't accurate, so I ended up at Bourbon

Street Bar and Grill. I had wings, but I wasn't too excited

about them, they just seemed excessively battered, but I was

really hungry and I'm really not sure what other options I had.

380

These are the things I think

about when I think about

butter: well, first and foremost

butter is not what makes the

world go round. Something.

some kind of force makes

the world go round, and I

think that the force in question

would be called momentum,

or maybe it would be called

inertia, but whatever the force

is called, I doubt that it

is called butter, and therefore!

when people ask what force

makes the world go round

just be aware that butter is

not the answer to that question!

381

// new instance of the Shipment class.

// pulls Shipment class

// into the demo class.

// int theFrequentShipperIdentificationNumber;

// double theNumberOfOutsideLinerInches = 0;

// double theDimensionalWeight = 0;

Sometimes when I go out to eat I get the feeling

that the food was microwaved after being pulled

out of a bag from something I could have purchased

from the frozen food section of the grocery store.

I went and got an oil change, which was something

I've been meaning to do for a while, and when I was

getting the oil change, the technician recommended

that I get my transmission fluid changed, so I did

that as well. I really don't want to spend more than

I need to right now, but I know that I've put a hell

of a lot of miles on my car over the last few months,

so I need to weigh being cautious with my spending

against the risks of unexpected car problems from

skipping on maintenance now.

382

I have to think. I was thinking about pursuing a graduate

certificate in Spanish Translation at UNLV. One issue is

that out-of-state tuition would make this cost prohibitive,

but it's possible that my time in Nevada during 2018 would

count toward my status as a Nevada resident, this is something

I have to look into, and I'd probably have to request records

from the Nevada DMV.

That UTA thing was a total disaster. I'm trying to squeeze

as much out of the experience as I can by going through the

course material, but. Yeah, that was a real interesting way

to flush $3,500 down the toilet.

I need to explore as many programs at as many universities as

I can. I really would prefer an in-person program rather than

something remote, or online. I'm still kind of hesitant to look

at anything. I'm hesitant to pursue a different graduate program

unless I know that it will be the right fit for me. I don't know

if there is any possibility of heading back to Texas for one semester,

and just taking two classes or whatever, but, who knows.

383

// user greeting for the customer

// initializes the scanner.

// System.out.println(invisible+"test area");

384

I really want to buy new pants, and

a new belt, but I also really want to

hold off on doing either, and yet,

even though I really want to keep my

spending as low as possible, I went out

to eat earlier today and I went out for

drinks the other day. I went out for

drinks the other night, and it was supposed

to be a kind of date, but, we didn't end up

meeting up. I went to the place she wanted

to meet up at, but she wasn't there. I waited

for about an hour, and then went home, and

like five minutes after I was on my way home,

she said she was there, and that I should turn

around and come back.

385

// /**/System.out.println(" Data for Package # 1"); // entryNumber// this number

// needs to increment depending on the number of packages. // this number needs

// to iterate depending on the number of packages.

// this line is being moved down System.out.println("Please enter the"+ red + "

// weight "+reset+"of your parcel:"); // " and the "+ red +"dimensions "+reset+

// System.out.println(" "); // I don't know what's going on here, the line won't

// skip. I know what it is, it's on the wrong line.

// keyboard.nextLine();

// System.out.println("Please enter the"+ red + " weight "+reset+"of your

// parcel:");

// double packageWeight = keyboard.nextDouble(); // this needs to be a double.

// // String packageWeight = keyboard.nextLine(); // this needs to be a double.

// // String packageWeight = keyboard.nextLine();

// keyboard.nextLine();

// Package package = new Package(packageWeight, packageLength, packageWidth,

// packageHeight);

386

That was discouraging, so I'm going to take a break from online dating.

This is the second time I deleted, second or maybe third time I've deleted

a dating profile in the last month. I switched accounts for some of my

autopay expenses, and I'm kind of just waiting until the switch over becomes active.

387

Queen of the Goths

she's cute,

and.

she's kind of talking to herself,

and.

it seems like a very

engaging conversation,

but

maybe she's singing,

and

she doesn't have a headset on,

she's either singing

from memory

talking to herself.

388

what a nightmare. it's night time right now.

I think that I've been putting

this together for the past 4 hours or so.

389

I settled the account with UTA. That was a fucking pain in the ass.

I don't know how many times I've gone over this situation on my blog,

but I'll go over it again. I was originally awarded 10500 in student

loans, but after withdrawing from the MSQF program, that amount was

reduced to about 8500, these are all rough numbers but they're close

enough, anyway, I was asked to return 2000 dollars to the University, UTA,

and I just remitted the payment of 2000 bucks a few minutes ago. Headache.

I really wasn't prepared for this. Anyway. I was really going to put this

whole ordeal off for a while, but when I looked into my student loan account,

or the account that services my student loans, I noticed that they adjusted

the student loan amount from 10500 to 8500, so I figured since the issue that

I was worried about most has been fixed, then I guess I'm comfortable settling

the balance with UTA. The issue that I was afraid of was paying twice, so to

speak, but if the loan servicer adjusted the amount due, then there is no need

to worry about paying twice, and that's why I figured I'd settle the tab at UTA.

390

One of the issues I'm dealing with right now

is that I have a balance due on my student

account at the University of Texas at Arlington.

This is because I dropped all of my classes and

withdrew from the MSQF program. My student loan

allocation for the Fall 2022 semester was reduced

retroactively, and now I have to pay back one-thousand

eight-hundred and sixty-five dollars. I was originally

awarded about ten-thousand in student loans, but that

award has been reduced retroactively to around eight-thousand

three-hundred. This is a fucking nightmare.

I'm making quite a few changes to my blog. It is just

going to be text, mostly. and pictures I'll put somewhere

else, or I'll create a new page for photographs that I've

accumulated over time.

391

I went to the gas station

to get a fountain drink,

and by the time

I get home, my soda is

gone? Where did it go?

I think I drank it all!

I went to the buffet at the Wynn and even though

I thought that the buffet was really nice, I don't

think that I got my money's worth, I just didn't eat

enough. I went in the morning, around 10 AM, and it

was really crowded, and then afterward I went driving

around town looking for something interesting. I tend

to take this blog in different directions and revise

things here or there depending on my mood, and as a

result it's changing constantly, and it keeps changing

and it will continue to change and I'm not sure how to

feel about that. things were going well and things were

all about to go even better but they did not and when I

think about where everything went they went worse than anything.

392

I'm pretty light now in terms of personal possessions.

I'm wondering what else is sellable on Facebook Marketplace.

I kept two hammers that I really like, they're really new,

and they are both really well made. Well, I think that it's a

total of three hammers that I kept, one is a jeweler's hammer.

I'm worried about the next few months. I could potentially have

a huge tax bill, and I have a limited number of options to reduce

my tax liabilities before the end of the year. Maybe this is one

of those years where I just have to eat it.

393

remember the citrus (2022)

This is where the things

that you think that you

remember turn out to be

memories that you yourself invented

You enjoyed the taste of

the lemonade but really

what you drank was orange

juice and you think that you

tasted citrus but you really enjoyed

the taste of oranges and not

lemons

She told you to drink from the tap

like a man, but you just really weren't

into that, you really didn't want to drink

from the tap, you are okay drinking from

the fountain you are okay when you drink

fountain drinks but you are not okay

drinking from the tap

Lemonade does not come from

the tap, even when the tap is loaded

with lemonade,

lemonade only comes from the soda

fountain, even though lemonade is not

soda

we can be friends

actually we can't even

be friends

you're just too fucking weird

you do weird shit and i

don't want to be associated

with you in

anyway

These wilted flowers shedding

petals blissfully in the sad faced sun.

at the beach lips on both sides

of the lips on both sides of the

wilted flowers shedding raindrops

blissfully in the morning sun i want

to say something original but i can't

think of anything original to say

she was clowning on me she was

picking on me or poking fun at me

and i didn't even realize it, but I'm

sure it was totally harmless and

maybe even well intentioned

394

There was a minor disappointment the other day. I asked someone

for a letter of recommendation, and she didn't want to do it. We

met at some bar in Kentucky back in June, and we chatted, and I

asked for her phone number and email address, stating that I might

need a letter of recommendation at some point in the future. I sent

her a message on LinkedIn the other day, asking for the letter of

recommendation and she basically isn't familiar enough with me to

really make any kind of recommendation one way or another. She also

asked me not to ask her again.

395

I did get a letter showing that my registration for an

Assumed Name has been recorded with the Tarrant County Clerk.

The Registration for my copyrights for some of my Letters from

Sanford Street haven't been dealt with by the U.S. Copyright Office,

and my Assumed Name registrations haven't been recorded with the

Secretary of State of Texas, and, other government related bullshit,

well, the Town of Panama Called me about a speeding ticket that was

issued several months back, they weren't aggressive or anything, but

they just told me that I can pay the ticket over the phone, so I did

that. I tried paying it online, but I received an error message, and

I wasn't able to pay it online, so I sent the Town of Panama, or maybe

I sent it to the County of LeFlore, but I sent a letter with screenshots

of the issue, or a printout of screenshots of the issue.

396

I did something interesting the other day, well, a few things actually,

I sold additional stuff on Facebook, the previous day I sold a sledgehammer,

axe, and pickaxe, I'm really not sure why I bought those things, but yesterday

I sold eight hammers, smaller ones than the ones I sold on Facebook a few days

before. Another thing that I did that I would say is interesting is that I bought

US Treasury bonds. Well, US Treasury Bills actually. There are a number of

different securities that you can buy from the US Treasury, there are savings

bonds, and those are why I was setting up the TreasuryDirect account, it seems

that I can only buy US Treasury Savings Bonds through the TreasuryDirect account,

but anyway, the other day I bought US Treasury Bills through my Fidelity account.

397

This is where the things

that you think that you

remember turn out to be

memories that you yourself invented

You enjoyed the taste of

the lemonade but really

what you drank was orange

juice and you think that you

tasted citrus but you really enjoyed

the taste of oranges and not

lemons

She told you to drink from the tap

like a man, but you just really weren't

into that, you really didn't want to drink

from the tap, you are okay drinking from

the fountain you are okay when you drink

fountain drinks but you are not okay

drinking from the tap

Lemonade does not come from

the tap, even when the tap is loaded

with lemonade,

lemonade only comes from the soda

fountain, even though lemonade is not

soda

we can be friends

actually we can't even

be friends

you're just too fucking weird

you do weird shit and i

don't want to be associated

with you in

anyway

These wilted flowers shedding

petals blissfully in the sad faced sun.

at the beach lips on both sides

of the lips on both sides of the

wilted flowers shedding raindrops

blissfully in the morning sun i want

to say something original but i can't

think of anything original to say

she was clowning on me she was

picking on me or poking fun at me

and i didn't even realize it, but I'm

sure it was totally harmless and

maybe even well intentioned

398

I went to the DMV, and they don't take walk-ins anymore,

everything is by appointment only, and this works, because

I set up my appointment already, and it's for next month, and

I have everything I need, the emissions inspection, my insurance

has been changed to Nevada, I have documents with my new address

on it, and, I had the VIN inspection performed. Is there anything

else that I need to get done? I don't think so. I did set up a

TreasuryDirect account, or, I mean, I got the process started. It

isn't as simple as setting up an online account, setting up the online

account is only part of the process, the other part of the process is

mailing in another form that needs to be reviewed by your bank. I went

to Citibank on Aliante Parkway. One of the strange things about the

Dallas / Fort Work area is that I don't remember any Citibank branches

in the area.

399

"remember the citrus" (2022)

This is where the things

that you think that you

remember turn out to be

memories that you yourself invented

You enjoyed the taste of

the lemonade but really

what you drank was orange

juice and you think that you

tasted citrus but you really enjoyed

the taste of oranges and not

lemons

She told you to drink from the tap

like a man, but you just really weren't

into that, you really didn't want to drink

from the tap, you are okay drinking from

the fountain you are okay when you drink

fountain drinks but you are not okay

drinking from the tap

Lemonade does not come from

the tap, even when the tap is loaded

with lemonade,

lemonade only comes from the soda

fountain, even though lemonade is not

soda

we can be friends

actually we can't even

be friends

you're just too fucking weird

you do weird shit and i

don't want to be associated

with you in

anyway

These wilted flowers shedding

petals blissfully in the sad faced sun.

at the beach lips on both sides

of the lips on both sides of the

wilted flowers shedding raindrops

blissfully in the morning sun i want

to say something original but i can't

think of anything original to say

she was clowning on me she was

picking on me or poking fun at me

and i didn't even realize it, but I'm

sure it was totally harmless and

maybe even well intentioned

400

My schedule for tomorrow, Monday morning, is to

head to the DMV to get my Driver's License, and

Vehicle Registration complete, and I was also

informed that I need a VIN inspection to be performed,

which is something that I was told while getting my

Emissions inspection performed. The guy at the Emissions

inspection place informed me that the number of times a

vehicle has been registered refers to when a vehicle is

purchased, and when the vehicles registration is renewed,

so if a person owns a car for 3 years or whatever, there's

the original registration, as well as two subsequent renewal

registrations, which would count for a total of 3 registrations.

Anyway, after I get that done, there is some paperwork that I

need taken care of at the bank to open an account with the U.S.

Treasury to buy savings bonds. I'm not sure how useful setting

up this account will be, but I think that I'll go ahead and do it.

401

I went to the buffet with my mom earlier, and we just got back.

The fortune cookie said: Opportunity always knocks at the least

opportune time, and I thought to myself: that's almost always true,

but how do I overcome that tendency for things, for opportunities

to be available when I really can't capitalize on them? and what

opportunities should I be on the lookout for, and be prepared for?

I'm reading spam messages from one of these bogus dating websites

I signed up for. It's one of those dating sites where you have to

pay per message. The obvious thing is that I'm getting tons of

incoming messages, and I doubt that these women are really paying

a dollar a message to reach out to my incomplete profile. If they

were, then I'm making that website a whole bunch of money with my

incomplete profile.

402

Valentine's Day in October (2022)

but what

is there

to do now

that you are bored

and what

can you tell me

now that you

have nothing

else to say

and try sending

me a candy bar

and try sending me

a chocolate

bar and

try sending me a greeting

card and try sending

me something romantic

and try sending me something

that I might like

and try sending me

something that might have

meaning to you

and try telling me

something

try telling my something

that I didn't know before

and try saying

something to me

that would

flatter me

and try flattering me

try getting me to

get interested in you

and try getting me to

want to see what

you are having

for a snack

and what fruits are out

of season.

you know what my favorite color is!

and you know what color

your favorite color is

and you know who my favorite person

is and you know who

your favorite person is!

and this is what I've been wanting

you to say to me this

entire time and you

just haven't come around to

saying it to me.

you really

can't tell me

that everything

is bad right now

because I know

that you're happy

you can't tell me that you

are unhappy because

I know what you like

and I know what

makes

you

happy and

I know what pleases

you and I am aware

of your likes and

dislikes.

Some

of the things

that you like are

kind of odd

and

some of the things

you like

are kind of strange

and some of the things

you like are

acquired tastes

and some of the

problems that

you get yourself

into over and

over are things

that you could

refrain from

getting yourself

into.

i had no idea

that someone had

a crush

on you

and i had no idea

someone was somewhat

obsessed

with you and i had

no idea that the feelings

were true and genuine

and i had no idea

that someone would

ever be attracted

to you and i had

no idea that jealousy

was an issue

that you would

have to deal with

she really liked you

and

you didn't realize it

and

you seemed to think

that

everything was not

what

it seemed and you seemed

imagine that you were

control when really you

were

something of a puppet

do you like being

back there do you

like being back where

you were and did

you like visiting other

parts of the country

and did you like seeing

places that you've never

seen before and do you

remember what it was

like to be here and do

you think that you'll

ever do that again

and do you think that

you will ever do that

again

and do you feel

that the rest is more

interesting and do you

think that the rest

of the world is rounder

but I'm not sure if I ran into

you at the Pizza Parlor and

you pointed out to me that the

toppings are beneath the cheese

or if the cheese is placed on top

of the toppings the bartender

asked me to leave and I'm

really not sure why

i don't know if it's because i missed

you when i most definitely should have

noticed you and

i don't know if i missed you when

i kind of set myself on a different path

and i don't know what the hell was

going on there

and i don't know if I forgot to

wash my hands before eating

and the

pizza seemed to arrive sooner

than i expected.

she actually really liked

you and it's obvious

that you really cared about

her even though she was

obviously a trouble maker

and she clearly would

make life difficult for you

if she didn't get what she

wanted from you and now

you are out of college and

now you are lonely and now

you have to start all over again

an update to how things

are going right now. again

it seems I'm being demonetized

for something on my blog. I'm

getting rid of the suspected content

but there really wasn't anything

specific pointed out. and so

I'm going around deleting what

could be offensive.

it was weird. before i left she

came over and asked me to

take her out for dinner, and

i had been wanting to take her

out for dinner for a while. we

went out a few times. i don't

think that she really liked me.

maybe she did, but i always

felt that she felt that she had

a better option, or that she liked

someone else more. sometimes

i'd be somewhere in the neighborhood

and then BANG she was there too.

we went to dinner. she came over

and asked me to take her out

to dinner, and we got into kind of

an argument when we were there.

and now the Nevada DMV website

is down, it's actually down and the

whole department is actually taking

time off until the issue is resolved.

so, even if I new what documents to

bring to a walk-in, i couldn't even

go if i wanted to because the offices

are closed.

i'm spending additional time cleaning up things here and

it just never seems to end there are so many

dirty things here that are not appropriate for the rules. the

rules

say that this stuff is not

okay

it is not okay to have yourself saying

and writing what you are saying and writing about

i went all the way across

town to go to a buffet called

imperial sushi and seafood.

it was a long drive. the food

was really nice, and, for 36

bucks it was worth the money,

but the drive was a nightmare.

maybe i just haven't ever been

used to rush hour traffic. I don't

know why.

403

What the hell opportunity should I be on

the lookout for? I'm thinking that I really

want as much overtime as I can get these next

few months, and I really think that overtime

opportunities are the opportunities that I

should be looking out for. When I think about

other opportunities that just didn't happen at the

right time, graduate school was one of those

opportunities that just didn't coincide with the

optimal time period in my life to be going to graduate

school. I did just get out of the mental health institution,

and things were just difficult all around. Then there was the

opportunity to get into the software developer program at Amazon,

and for some reason there was just always something else that

popped up, usually just overtime opportunities.

There is something that I found that I might actually be

interested in using some of the software development skills

for, I might be interested in using some of my software development

skills to convert my blog entries into integer sequences that I can

post on OeisWiki or the OEIS Wiki. I vaguely remember how to do this,

but it's something like, when the code comes across a certain letter,

or character, it returns a specific integer, but there were other

things that I remember that I think I can do, like, I think I'm able

to turn images into integer sequences.

I'm trying to think. I did look up the subject of DanishCookieUXorious

while I was clearing out my old bookmarks, and this was interesting

because I really remember her being blonde, and for a minute I wanted

to look up that poem I wrote about the bartender on Collins. I could

have sworn. It happens over and over again. I could have sworn that

person was blonde.

This free time that I'm having is an opportunity, free time is always

an opportunity that's. It's the kind of opportunity that I'm unfamiliar

with capitalizing on. What do I do?

404

Valentine's Day in October

but what

is there

to do now

that you are bored

and what

can you tell me

now that you

have nothing

else to say

and try sending

me a candy bar

and try sending me

a chocolate

bar and

try sending me a greeting

card and try sending

me something romantic

and try sending me something

that I might like

and try sending me

something that might have

meaning to you

and try telling me

something

try telling my something

that I didn't know before

and try saying

something to me

that would

flatter me

and try flattering me

try getting me to

get interested in you

and try getting me to

want to see what

you are having

for a snack

and what fruits are out

of season.

you know what my favorite color is!

and you know what color

your favorite color is

and you know who my favorite person

is and you know who

your favorite person is!

and this is what I've been wanting

you to say to me this

entire time and you

just haven't come around to

saying it to me.

you really

can't tell me

that everything

is bad right now

because I know

that you're happy

you can't tell me that you

are unhappy because

I know what you like

and I know what

makes

you

happy and

I know what pleases

you and I am aware

of your likes and

dislikes.

Some

of the things

that you like are

kind of odd

and

some of the things

you like

are kind of strange

and some of the things

you like are

acquired tastes

and some of the

problems that

you get yourself

into over and

over are things

that you could

refrain from

getting yourself

into.

i had no idea

that someone had

a crush

on you

and i had no idea

someone was somewhat

obsessed

with you and i had

no idea that the feelings

were true and genuine

and i had no idea

that someone would

ever be attracted

to you and i had

no idea that jealousy

was an issue

that you would

have to deal with

she really liked you

and

you didn't realize it

and

you seemed to think

that

everything was not

what

it seemed and you seemed

imagine that you were

control when really you

were

something of a puppet

do you like being

back there do you

like being back where

you were and did

you like visiting other

parts of the country

and did you like seeing

places that you've never

seen before and do you

remember what it was

like to be here and do

you think that you'll

ever do that again

and do you think that

you will ever do that

again

and do you feel

that the rest is more

interesting and do you

think that the rest

of the world is rounder

but I'm not sure if I ran into

you at the Pizza Parlor and

you pointed out to me that the

toppings are beneath the cheese

or if the cheese is placed on top

of the toppings the bartender

asked me to leave and I'm

really not sure why

i don't know if it's because i missed

you when i most definitely should have

noticed you and

i don't know if i missed you when

i kind of set myself on a different path

and i don't know what the hell was

going on there

and i don't know if I forgot to

wash my hands before eating

and the

pizza seemed to arrive sooner

than i expected.

she actually really liked

you and it's obvious

that you really cared about

her even though she was

obviously a trouble maker

and she clearly would

make life difficult for you

if she didn't get what she

wanted from you and now

you are out of college and

now you are lonely and now

you have to start all over again

an update to how things

are going right now. again

it seems I'm being demonetized

for something on my blog. I'm

getting rid of the suspected content

but there really wasn't anything

specific pointed out. and so

I'm going around deleting what

could be offensive.

it was weird. before i left she

came over and asked me to

take her out for dinner, and

i had been wanting to take her

out for dinner for a while. we

went out a few times. i don't

think that she really liked me.

maybe she did, but i always

felt that she felt that she had

a better option, or that she liked

someone else more. sometimes

i'd be somewhere in the neighborhood

and then BANG she was there too.

we went to dinner. she came over

and asked me to take her out

to dinner, and we got into kind of

an argument when we were there.

and now the Nevada DMV website

is down, it's actually down and the

whole department is actually taking

time off until the issue is resolved.

so, even if I new what documents to

bring to a walk-in, i couldn't even

go if i wanted to because the offices

are closed.

i'm spending additional time cleaning up things here and

it just never seems to end there are so many

dirty things here that are not appropriate for the rules. the

rules

say that this stuff is not

okay

it is not okay to have yourself saying

and writing what you are saying and writing about

i went all the way across

town to go to a buffet called

imperial sushi and seafood.

it was a long drive. the food

was really nice, and, for 36

bucks it was worth the money,

but the drive was a nightmare.

maybe i just haven't ever been

used to rush hour traffic. I don't

know why.

405

I think that I have everything I need to get set

up with a driver's license and vehicle registration

in Nevada. I needed statements from a bank or credit

card, and I have that now, I had to print them up, so

I went to the UPS store, but they wanted quite a bit

of money to print them. Like five bucks, so I went to

the library instead. It was still more than I wanted

to pay, but it was two dollars total, one to renew my

library card, and another dollar to print the documents

I needed.

I feel funny, that I pinch pennies with certain things,

but I spend money on some of my bad habits. I got a letter

from Coppell, Texas. It wasn't anything Texas related.

Strange. I don't know what was going on those last few months

in Texas, but I swear, everything was spiraling down the

shitter. It really was. Everything was really spiraling

down the shitter. Nearly everyone I came across, or, 95

percent, seemed to be in a mood to start some kind of an argument.

406

what could I be doing right now? i can't really

think of anything, and I don't really want to rush

into anything. I have time, and I should be using

it for something, but what?

407

I have most of everything that I need to complete

my change of residence from Texas to Nevada, and

to request a Nevada Driver's License and to register

my vehicle in Nevada. The main thing that helped me

was an account that I set up with Bank of America

on a whim, just a savings account. Like I said, I

set it up on a whim, and I'm not sure why I set

it up, but the statement cycle just finished, most

of my other accounts have statement cycles that

would end later in the month, and so, if I were

to have waited for any of the other accounts

to issue a new statement with my updated address,

it would probably be another week. The issue that

I'm having, right now, however, is that the Nevada

DMV website is not working. It's down or something.

It's not loading.

408

that was a garbage kind of a thing a

kind of disaster kind of a nightmare

a kind of worst than anything a kind of

thing that didn't go well a kind of horse

that cannot be ridden. a kind of donkey.

409

What was the first issue that I was facing when

it came to graduate school? Group work, and group

projects. I just really hate doing them, and they're

rarely ever a collaborative effort. Most of the time

there's this dynamic of establishing a pecking order.

I don't want to make a contribution if I'm just going

to be discredited for any work that I do. In this case,

the person that I was originally assigned to work with.

She was positioning herself in a way where, I would basically

work on something, and I would have to run it by her first,

and she would either say yes or no on it, and I thought that

was shitty, like, fuck that, why doesn't she just do all the

work, and I have the final say on it.

410

This was back from UTA.

I still really do not

like doing group work.

There was a group project for MIS 764

and. well. there is a group project for MIS 764

and you know. it's something that's going on right now.

but I still really wish that I could be working

independently.

411

Valentine's Day in October (2022)

but what

is there

to do now

that you are bored

and what

can you tell me

now that you

have nothing

else to say

and try sending

me a candy bar

and try sending me

a chocolate

bar and

try sending me a greeting

card and try sending

me something romantic

and try sending me something

that I might like

and try sending me

something that might have

meaning to you

and try telling me

something

try telling my something

that I didn't know before

and try saying

something to me

that would

flatter me

and try flattering me

try getting me to

get interested in you

and try getting me to

want to see what

you are having

for a snack

and what fruits are out

of season.

you know what my favorite color is!

and you know what color

your favorite color is

and you know who my favorite person

is and you know who

your favorite person is!

and this is what I've been wanting

you to say to me this

entire time and you

just haven't come around to

saying it to me.

you really

can't tell me

that everything

is bad right now

because I know

that you're happy

you can't tell me that you

are unhappy because

I know what you like

and I know what

makes

you

happy and

I know what pleases

you and I am aware

of your likes and

dislikes.

Some

of the things

that you like are

kind of odd

and

some of the things

you like

are kind of strange

and some of the things

you like are

acquired tastes

and some of the

problems that

you get yourself

into over and

over are things

that you could

refrain from

getting yourself

into.

i had no idea

that someone had

a crush

on you

and i had no idea

someone was somewhat

obsessed

with you and i had

no idea that the feelings

were true and genuine

and i had no idea

that someone would

ever be attracted

to you and i had

no idea that jealousy

was an issue

that you would

have to deal with

she really liked you

and

you didn't realize it

and

you seemed to think

that

everything was not

what

it seemed and you seemed

imagine that you were

control when really you

were

something of a puppet

do you like being

back there do you

like being back where

you were and did

you like visiting other

parts of the country

and did you like seeing

places that you've never

seen before and do you

remember what it was

like to be here and do

you think that you'll

ever do that again

and do you think that

you will ever do that

again

and do you feel

that the rest is more

interesting and do you

think that the rest

of the world is rounder

but I'm not sure if I ran into

you at the Pizza Parlor and

you pointed out to me that the

toppings are beneath the cheese

or if the cheese is placed on top

of the toppings the bartender

asked me to leave and I'm

really not sure why

i don't know if it's because i missed

you when i most definitely should have

noticed you and

i don't know if i missed you when

i kind of set myself on a different path

and i don't know what the hell was

going on there

and i don't know if I forgot to

wash my hands before eating

and the

pizza seemed to arrive sooner

than i expected.

she actually really liked

you and it's obvious

that you really cared about

her even though she was

obviously a trouble maker

and she clearly would

make life difficult for you

if she didn't get what she

wanted from you and now

you are out of college and

now you are lonely and now

you have to start all over again

an update to how things

are going right now. again

it seems I'm being demonetized

for something on my blog. I'm

getting rid of the suspected content

but there really wasn't anything

specific pointed out. and so

I'm going around deleting what

could be offensive.

it was weird. before i left she

came over and asked me to

take her out for dinner, and

i had been wanting to take her

out for dinner for a while. we

went out a few times. i don't

think that she really liked me.

maybe she did, but i always

felt that she felt that she had

a better option, or that she liked

someone else more. sometimes

i'd be somewhere in the neighborhood

and then BANG she was there too.

we went to dinner. she came over

and asked me to take her out

to dinner, and we got into kind of

an argument when we were there.

and now the Nevada DMV website

is down, it's actually down and the

whole department is actually taking

time off until the issue is resolved.

so, even if I new what documents to

bring to a walk-in, i couldn't even

go if i wanted to because the offices

are closed.

i'm spending additional time cleaning up things here and

it just never seems to end there are so many

dirty things here that are not appropriate for the rules. the

rules

say that this stuff is not

okay

it is not okay to have yourself saying

and writing what you are saying and writing about

i went all the way across

town to go to a buffet called

imperial sushi and seafood.

it was a long drive. the food

was really nice, and, for 36

bucks it was worth the money,

but the drive was a nightmare.

maybe i just haven't ever been

used to rush hour traffic. I don't

know why.

412

I should probably just forget about graduate

school altogether. I don't want to be in a

position where, the only thing I do is spend

all of my time working for someone else, or

doing someone else's work, pay tuition and

shit for doing so, and in the process get

discredited for any work that I do.

413

These things have not been here

the whole time, and they have

not been the best of the best, and

they have not been the sticks of the butter.

She asked me to send a photograph

of me, stroking a stick of butter, and

I had to tell the girl that it wasn't

really what she was after, and she

really did not want me to send her

a photograph

of me stroking a stick of butter.

What she really wanted was a video

of me making a duck bill with my hand

and sticking my duck bill hand into

a bowl of butter, sticks of butter

are not the answer!

Places that I think about.

I might not see them again,

but places that I've been to,

that I might not see again, that

I think about. Gallup, New Mexico,

Somerville, Tennessee, and

La Vergne, Tennessee.

and while some people wish upon a

star, it's totally possible that I would

have to wish upon a stick of butter

and tell people that the butter, that

praying to a stick of butter, that

wishing upon a stick of butter is

not the solution to the

it's not the solution to whatever issue

you are having.

414

I bought a carton of eggnog and drank it all.

I'm kind of just hanging out in my car and I'm

probably going to go back in and get something else.

There's nothing to do at home, but I'm not bored to the

point that I really want to go prowl the streets. I think

that I've taken care of most of the stuff, the preliminary

stuff related to relocating, I have to change my addresses

in my accounts first, then once I have statements, then I

can go to the Nevada DMV to request a Nevada Driver's

License, and then I can request Nevada Vehicle Registration.

415

Yeah, I really don't know what to do.

I don't have any specific plans for the

future, and maybe I should just leave it

that way. Maybe I should just go with the

flow until something comes up, or an

opportunity comes up.

These are basically the things I need in Life to Eat the

butter, but I already established that

Butter is not the answer, and

yet you did not listen to me.

Stay where the people are rather than

going to that place where the invisible

people are. That's where the nest is and

where the birds go.

416

Yeah, I really don't know what to do. I don't have

any specific plans for the future, and maybe I should

just leave it that way. Maybe I should just go with the

flow until something comes up, or an opportunity comes up.

417

Well, I guess I can think of today as the

date that I've moved to Las Vegas. Today is October 8th, 2022

418

Postcards from Tennessee # 17 & Butter is not the Answer # 17

but maybe these are where there

are things that are not things that will

not go well.

419

Postcards from Tennessee # 17 &

system dot out dot print line:

i'll have to come back around to this.

system dot out dot print line

sincerely comma kenneth

420

when life gives you grapes you

well, you um,

you know probably won't

be able to make lemonade or anything.

https://dmv.nv.gov/newresident.htm

so, you know lemonade is of the table

for you.

when life.

gives you grapes!

421

there were all of these things that

were amazing and all of these

other things that were even greater

than places that I saw before.

I totally ate all of the so many fried turkeys

that were hanging out

by the red wheelbarrow

you know the one glazed with

soy sauce and beside the

kentucky fried

kung pao chickens

which

themselves were drenched in

tabasco sauce

I request neither forgiveness

nor do I intend to apologize for

my actions

because

I spent several hours

of quality time

with a certain young housewife

who

braless and dressed in negligee

and

whose wild hair suggested

she spent even more additional

even higher quality time with

both the ice man

and the fish man

either sequentially

simultaneously

neither would surprise me

left me breathless exhausted

as well as famished

I thought I gave a good

account of myself

but then along came

the milkman

and she still

had enough energy

for

round four

I was there

I saw it all

Objectives:

Copyrights: innocuous posts

Letters from Sanford Street

#DanishCookieUxorious

Notes from Arlington, Texas

Patents: Fermentation Apparatus

Distillation Apparatus

Trademarks: Chestnut + Hazel

Chestnut & Hazel

Chestnut and Hazel

Research: Electives

Patent and Trademark Process

Selling Stuff Online / E-Commerce / Contemporary Verbiage of the Same

Tasks: Clean Up Google Photos

422

Could I do certain things without going back to

college? sure, but, I have no idea how I would do them.

423

|| = || ||||| |||| ∥ ∥ ∥

424

IxD = Interaction Design, from this diagram, it

looks like it's part of the overall User Experience design process. or something.

Charles Babbage = computer mechanical computer calculator

calculates addition and subtraction

|| = A Character denoting parallel lines

open access = SPARC / FAIR / Creative Commons / has to do with copyright licensing / or some

kind of principles related to research and access to copyrighted materials.

stock photographs =

but here are

where the wild animals are

doing animal things

where they say to themselves:

are

animals!

425

What the hell was I just now thinking about doing. continue cleaning up and

editing the blog. oh I remember. Clean out google photos.

426

There was something that I needed to do, or that I was thinking of doing

tomorrow, but for some reason it just slipped my mind. / #DanishCookieUXorious / I'm not

going to stylize the lettering the way she does.

427

What else do I need to do? Well, as far as the Blog goes: I think that

I'm going to Archive anything that has already been submitted for copyright registration. So.

the reflections from chestnut street series. when I come across those posts. I'll re-title

them as archived content. or whatever.

428

The following is an old poem of mine that I wrote a while back. This is

from the Chestnut + Hazel archive, and I honestly found it very funny,

but, also very sad and depressing as well. I don't know what I was thinking

about when I wrote this poem. I really don't. I really think that it's funny.

Right now I'm working on just cleaning up my blog and that's pretty much it.

429

Porn Videos

I'm thinking about creating a new genre of adult films.

Basically they will involve normeenas and gorblanas

engaging in shorblanification of their adamantios moogies.

It will be so nasty, that search engines will not run ads

involving normeenas and gorblanas doing anything at

all, even regular stuff like fishing and flying kites because

The association that people will have with normeenas and

gorblanas will be inherently pornographic, and the acts that

they engage in will be so disgusting that there will even be

Congressional hearings, all on C-Span, discussing the prospect

of regulating the acts that normeenas and gorblanas engage

in. Senators will run on platforms to regulate the normeenas

and gorblanas. Judges will be appointed who are strictly

opposed to sexual relationships between normeenas and

gorlanas. Anti-miscegenation legislation will be on the dockets

of every legislative body to restrict how normeenas and

gorblanas interact. Adoption agencies will be prohibited

from facilitating the adoption of progeny from these unions.

No one will be able to adopt a normeena-gorblana child.

Normeena-gorblana children who are not adopted will grow

up on the streets, selling teleomarkinites and shamdoobies

to make ends meet. They will steal mammyonography from

the adult bookshops and resell them at the swap meet and

flea market and on amazon and ebay and craigslist and letgo.

The normeena-gorblana rights commission will fight the

oppression of the people, but the commission's funding will

come primarily from the adult film industry, and they will

not be taken seriously, or they will be seen as perpetuation

the perversions of the normeena-gorblana fetishists. A new

political party will emerge to protect the normeenas, and a

separate party will emerge to protect the gorblanas, and new

adult films will feature dirty talk between the two parties and

hardcore magazine will be sold, but buyers will need a permit

from the decency agency in order to buy them. A test will be

administered to see whether or not a person qualifies, only the

most sane and normal people will be allowed to but these books.

430

It's hot, and I'm fucking tired.

I went out to eat, just fish and

chips like I usually eat when I go

out to eat. What the hell was I

thinking about? I have to drop off

my mail at the post office.

431

there was a woman at the post office

and she said to me

she asked me if

i knew how to lick stamps.

if i was good.

licking stamps?

how would I know that?

how would I know if I'm good at licking

stamps?

What the hell do I have to do right now?

432

idea for a feature for customer

relationship management application / vernacular localization / contingent upon occupation / professional

or occupation based localization / for example / cosmetics / pharmaceuticals / beverages / agriculture / munitions / petrochemical / energy

433

maybe you are eating

more frogs than you were

eating other things maybe

you were eating snails and

well if you were they I'm sure

that you know what it means to be

hungry for more for more snails for more things to eat!

idea for a feature for customer relationship management software or

application / verbiage and dialect localization / contingent upon occupation / professional or

occupation based localization / for example / cosmetics / pharmaceuticals / beverages / agriculture / munitions / petrochemical / energy

434

Objectives

Copyrights: (x) #DanishCookieUXorious

(x) innocuous posts

Letters from Sanford Street

Notes from Arlington, Texas

Patents: Envelope Design

Trademarks: Chestnut + Hazel

Chestnut & Hazel

Chestnut and Hazel

435

I'm glad the weekend is

just a few hours away.

it's hot.

the world burns the world

the atmosphere is starting

to turn into a kind of oven

and we will all be cooked!

436

It was fried and that is just

the way it is when things are cooked

they are turned into food and have they

been cooked or not have they

been turned into a kind of food or have

they not been cooked?

437

I think about times in my life where

I'm going through the kinds of things I'm

going through right now. I don't know how to

describe how it's different this time, but it

is different. It's different because things are

confusing; I'm confused about how to deal with;

I'm confused about how to move forward, and I'm

confused about what to do next, but things aren't

really all that bleak right now, things really aren't

all that hopeless. Things are just confusing. I just

really don't know what to do next.

438

maybe there is something else out there

for you. something that you can do

you are too dumb for this!

439

do you really think

that I am too dumb for this?

440

no, i do not think you are too

dumb for this.

441

I think that I'm just going to operate

under the assumption that Nevada is where

I'm going to be for now, and I'll just go

through with getting a Nevada Driver's

License, and Nevada Plates.

442

fabio was

at the grocery store

his hair flowing

and his tits were

perkier than ever

he reached for a

stick of land o' lakes

and i told him

straight up

fabio

butter

is not the answer

and he said to me

a suave as ever

that he couldn't believe

that butter is not the answer.

443

I keep coming across this

poem called valentines day in october.

444

fabio was

at the grocery store

his hair flowing

and his tits were

perkier than ever

he reached for a

stick of land o' lakes

and i told him

straight up

fabio

butter

is not the answer

and he said to me

a suave as ever

that he couldn't believe

that butter is not the answer.

445

i did get back on the dating

apps today

and i'm actually not even telling

the truth in this case

but i've already had tons of

flirtation bots

hitting me up

believe me

i know what this

woman is up to

she's the kind of woman

who puts butter on

her pancakes

but a woman who

puts butter on her

pancakes is not the

answer

and butter

is still never the

fucking answer.

446

is there anything

else you would

like to tell me?

447

no, you will find out

the hard way!

448

what do you mean by that?

449

you can search the whole world

for the fucking answer

but

butter

is not the fucking answer.

there are so many questions in life,

and one of those

questions might be

whether or not

butter is the answer.

butter is not the answer.

450

You can see what the

majority of us see and

you can tell me what you

are looking for, but most

of the things that we are

looking for are irrelevant to

the objective we are

trying to accomplish,

and these are not what

the people want, and these

are not what the people

are thinking of.

451

what people really want

and what people are really

thinking about

is that butter. is. the answer to

all of the problems of

the human condition,

but really,

butter,

is never the answer.

452

I don't want you

to tell anyone

this because it gives

us a competitive advantage

over the competition, and we

want to have an advantage

over the competition

because they

are incompetent, and do

not deserve to defeat us

in this highly competitive

environment.

Well? What it

it that I want to tell you

that I don't want

the competition

to be aware of?

It's this, and this alone:

BUTTER IS NOT THE ANSWER!

453

I'm thinking. I have no idea

what I should be doing right now.

454

but what

is there

to do now

that you are bored

and what

can you tell me

now that you

have nothing

else to say

455

and try sending

me a candy bar

and try sending me

a chocolate

bar and

try sending me a greeting

card and try sending

me something romantic

and try sending me something

that I might like

and try sending me

something that might have

meaning to you

and try telling me

something

456

try telling my something

that I didn't know before

and try saying

something to me

that would

457

flatter me

and try flattering me

try getting me to

get interested in you

and try getting me to

want to see what

you are having

for a snack

and what fruits are out

of season.

458

you know what my favorite color is!

and you know what color

your favorite color is

and you know who my favorite person

is and you know who

your favorite person is!

and this is what I've been wanting

you to say to me this

entire time and you

just haven't come around to

saying it to me.

459

you really

can't tell me

that everything

is bad right now

because I know

that you're happy

you can't tell me that you

are unhappy because

I know what you like

and I know what

makes

you

happy and

I know what pleases

you and I am aware

of your likes and

dislikes.

460

Some

of the things

that you like are

kind of odd

and

some of the things

you like

are kind of strange

and some of the things

you like are

acquired tastes

and some of the

problems that

you get yourself

into over and

over are things

that you could

refrain from

getting yourself

into.

461

i had no idea

that someone had

a crush

on you

and i had no idea

someone was somewhat

obsessed

with you and i had

no idea that the feelings

were true and genuine

and i had no idea

that someone would

ever be attracted

to you and i had

no idea that jealousy

was an issue

that you would

have to deal with

she really liked you

and

you didn't realize it

and

you seemed to think

that

everything was not

what

it seemed and you seemed

imagine that you were

control when really you

were

something of a puppet

462

do you like being

back there do you

like being back where

you were and did

you like visiting other

parts of the country

and did you like seeing

places that you've never

seen before and do you

remember what it was

like to be here and do

you think that you'll

ever do that again

and do you think that

you will ever do that

again

and do you feel

that the rest is more

interesting and do you

think that the rest

of the world is rounder

but I'm not sure if I ran into

you at the Pizza Parlor and

you pointed out to me that the

toppings are beneath the cheese

or if the cheese is placed on top

of the toppings the bartender

asked me to leave and I'm

really not sure why

i don't know if it's because i missed

you when i most definitely should have

noticed you and

i don't know if i missed you when

i kind of set myself on a different path

and i don't know what the hell was

going on there

and i don't know if I forgot to

wash my hands before eating

and the

pizza seemed to arrive sooner

than i expected.

463

I just applied for a position here in Las Vegas, and,

I'll continue to look for work. I don't think that I'll

be heading back to Arlington, it just seems like it's really

not going to happen. I'm putting a few other things on the

back burner for now. Like continuing to work on Chestnut + Hazel,

more specifically, business registration aspects of it. I tried

looking for positions at Amazon, but there was nothing available

in the area. I was thinking that, since it's somewhat easy to

transfer between locations with Amazon, that maybe I'd get in

at a location here, and then, if something were to bring me back

to Dallas / Fort Worth, that maybe I'd transfer back there. There's

just nothing really in Dallas / Fort Worth, though, other than college,

and even that was kind of falling apart.

I did file a copyright for a few of my posts from the Letters from

Sanford Street series, I used the "Online Literary Works" form, and

it was somewhat more involved than using the Standard Registration

process, but it does allow me to have claims on each individual post,

rather than having a single claim one gigantic series. In this specific

case, even though there is a single application for the 14 posts that

I registered, each post is registered as part of a larger registration,

using the previous method that I used, I would have to compile all the

posts into a single post, and then register that single post as

a "Collective Work" that I'd have a claim on.

This distinction probably

isn't obvious to someone who doesn't

that might make this easier to understand,

is that it's like having 14

different deeds to 14 different 1 acre plots of

land, rather than having

1 deed to a single 14 acre plot of land.

464